New Beginnings: When Everything Changes
by miraleeann
Summary: Part 3 of the New Beginnings series. When horrific events occur both Sirius and Harry lose the only family they knew and must find everything that they need in each other. This story does contain corporal punishment. AU
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: You should probably read parts 1 & 2 before this or some of it won't make much sense. Obviously this is AU.**

* * *

"If you would just try them I am nearly certain that you would like them," she urged in a gentle voice.

Harry's nose scrunched up in a disgusted fashion as he looked down at the small pile of fried tomatoes. He liked raw tomatoes just fine, but when fried they reminded him of a pile of gooey troll bogeys.

"Such a face," James laughed loudly. "You would think we are serving you goblin dung."

"They look slimy," Harry replied with a serious face.

"One bite," Lily pressed. "If you don't like them after you try them I promise you will never find them on your plate again."

"You heard your mother, one bite," James said in a tone that he reserved for the rare occasion where he had to deliver his words in a way in which they would not leave room for argument.

Harry gave his parents a pitiful look as he poked the small pile of food with his fork once more.

"Hey there," James said, his voice now its normal gentle nature. "We talked about this remember? You gave me your word that you would start trying new foods."

It had been a constant struggle for the past few years. Somewhere around the age of five, Harry had become quite the picky eater. Lily was forever planning their every meal around what her son would or would not eat. Now at eight years of age, his parents had decided that it was time to at least try and persuade their only child to broaden his taste palate.

Harry sighed as he cut the smallest bit off of the large tomato.

"That a boy," James smiled as he watched his son bring the fork to his mouth.

James and Lily waited with bated breath as Harry bit the tomato off of the fork and slowly chewed.

"Well?" Lily asked as her son swallowed.

"It's good," Harry admitted as he quickly cut a much larger piece of the tomato.

James smiled widely as his wife breathed a sigh of relief.

A wide grin overtook Lily's face as she watched Harry quickly eat the rest of his food. "What time is Sirius coming over this evening?" She asked her husband.

"Sirius is coming over?" Harry asked excitedly.

"Long after you are in bed I'm afraid," James relied before taking a bite of his dinner.

"Can I wait up to see him?" Harry asked. "Just to say goodnight at least?"

"Absolutely not," Lily shook her head. "You will see him tomorrow for Sunday night dinner."

It was a tradition that Lydia had insisted upon when her two boys moved out years ago, and Charles had shortly joined her in that as well. Regardless of what else was going on, she wanted both of her boys every Sunday by three sharp for dinner. She had presented the idea firmly, as though she had expected resistance, but there had been none. The tradition was easily a favorite of both James and Sirius, and with time, had grown to include James' family. And, if asked Harry and even Lily would answer that Sunday was their favorite day of the week.

"No fair," Harry decided in a soft voice.

"Sorry Love but your mum is right. It will be late when he gets here and he and I have some important business to discuss. However I am sure that tomorrow you could talk him into a game or two of Exploding Snap."

"I'm sure that he could talk Sirius into practically anything," Lily commented causing Harry to grin.

Harry loved his parents deeply but he was sure that there wasn't another human on the planet that he felt the same way about that he did about his godfather. Sirius was coolest adult that he knew. Of course he adored Remus who often brought him brilliant books about Quidditch and told him amazing stories about Hogwarts. And he liked Peter who never showed up without some sort of sweet for Harry. Peter always acted as though everything Harry did was absolutely brilliant. He cheered loudly as the child soared around his backyard on his broom and often said that Harry was exactly like James.

Sirius was different though.

Sirius didn't have to spoil Harry with material items, even though he typically did. His presence and attention was enough to thrill the child. He never spoke to Harry sternly or got upset with him over anything. He always made Harry feel as though he had come to see him and that talking with his parents was just something he did to be polite. He told Harry amazing stories about the things he and his dad would do when they were young. He encouraged him to push himself to try new tricks on his broom. He taught him spells despite the fact that Harry wouldn't be allowed to hold a wand for nearly three more years. When his parents said no to something, which was rare, Sirius either persuaded them to change their minds or joked with Harry about how unfair they were. He never treated him like a child, but like a friend.

Harry adored his godfather and his godfather adored him.

"Look at the time," James said jumping up from the table. "I have to be going." He leaned over and placed a single kiss on his son's head before Lily stood. Turning to his wife he kissed her lips gently.

"Be safe," she instructed in a voice that gave little room for argument.

"I shall be home in a few hours," James replied. He was always careful not to make promises to her that he knew were close to impossible to keep. He looked down at his son giving him a small grin. "Take care of your mum for me okay?"

Harry nodded proudly. Whenever his dad had to go out he always left Harry with the same instructions. It made him feel quite grown. He knew that most of his friend's dads would instruct their sons to listen to their mothers and he loved that his dad never did. It would have been a pointless reminder anyway, Harry always minded his mum. The last thing he wanted in the world was to give her any reason to punish him. He had succeeded in doing so only once. He had been seven and had been spending the night at the Burrow with his best mate Ron. The two of them had somehow gotten into their heads that sneaking out to fly in the middle of the night would be a good idea and his mum had firmly dissuaded him from ever trying something like that again.

"Is he going to another meeting?" Harry asked after he heard the fire place roar to life in the parlor.

Lily nodded as he swallowed a mouthful of food.

"Ron says that there is a war starting."

"Did he?" Lily asked hoping that her tone had stayed neutral. "Where did he hear that?"

"From Fred and George," Harry answered honestly. He trusted his parents. They were never ones to turn around and get his friends into trouble. "I think they heard from Bill."

Lily was silent as she ate another bite of her dinner.

"So is there?" Harry asked. "A war starting I mean."

There were few moments in her life that Lily regretted the way in which she and James raised their son. They had rarely lied to him about things going on in the world around them or in their own home. They enforced few rules and treated Harry with respect. "It seems as though one may be starting," Lily answered honestly despite the fact that the last thing she wanted was her child sitting up at night, his mind heavy with worries. "Voldemort and his followers seem to be gaining some power and those of us that do not agree with it are prepared to fight back."

"Because he hates muggles right?" Harry asked after taking a drink from his glass of pumpkin juice.

"That is a big part of it," Lily replied. "He doesn't fancy anyone who isn't pureblood."

Harry made a face at these words as he ate the last bite of his dinner.

The pair sat in silence for a moment before Lily cleared her throat. "Alright bath for you."

"I'm not dirty," Harry replied.

"You were out flying nearly all morning," Lily retorted. "I can still see a smudge of dirt on your cheek from then."

Harry grinned at her words. "I can have tea with you after?"

"You may. I want you to make sure your scrub under your nails though and behind your ears. Be sure to actually dry yourself before putting on your pajamas too. They aren't meant to stick to your body."

Harry playfully rolled his eyes before placing his hands on the table and pushing his chair backwards. "Can we have those chocolate biscuits with our tea please?"

"I suppose we could," she replied pleased that they were discussing biscuits rather than war.

* * *

Harry rolled onto his side. He leaned his head over the side of his bed in an attempt to hear the conversation going on below him. He knew that his godfather was there. The sounds of the floo had alerted Harry the moment the man had entered the house nearly fifteen minutes prior.

Harry really had tried to obey his mum and go to sleep two hours ago when she had tucked him in. However sleep hadn't come easily and after hearing the floo he had given up on the idea completely.

He knew that his mum was asleep or at least close to it. He had heard her walk down the hall and the sound of her bedroom door closing over an hour ago.

Carefully and as quietly as he possibly could Harry sat up. His sock clad feet touched the floor before he slowly pulled himself to a standing position.

He walked slowly, careful to avoid the spots that caused his floor to creak. Once at his bedroom door he gripped the doorknob and turned it slowly.

A moment later he stepped into the upstairs hallway.

Just as he had thought, his parent's bedroom door was tightly closed. No light shown out from under it.

He tiptoed down the hallway and then crouched down at the top of the staircase.

"I've talked it over with Lily a hundred times, it makes perfect sense," James said. "Peter being our secret keeper is a far less obvious choice than you."

Harry sat down on the top step causing it to creak softly. He held his breath as he prayed that no one else had heard it.

"It does make perfect sense," Sirius replied. "When Peter arrives I am sure that he will agree. Protecting each other right now is the most important thing."

There was a long pause of silence causing Harry to slip down one more step. He was sure that they had lowered their voices and that getting a bit closer would help him to hear them once more.

"We're still doing dinner tomorrow night then?" Sirius asked.

"Mum is insistent that we do. It's nice though, a bit of normalcy at least."

"Now I am positive that you are supposed to be in bed young Sir."

Harry felt his stomach drop at the sound of his mum's angry voice behind him. He quickly stood up and turned to face her. He looked up at her with a pleading face. "Mum I can explain," he whispered. "Really I can."

" _Harry James_ ," the stern voice came from below him.

Harry turned to his side, his back now pressed against the wall, as he looked down the stairs to see his father at the bottom of them.

Harry opened his mouth in an attempt to explain himself but before he could get a single word out his father was up the stairs. He took him gently by the arm, peeling him away from the wall.

"Back to bed with you this instant," James said sternly as he led his son past his wife and down the hall towards his bedroom.

It wasn't until they crossed into Harry's room that James let go off his son and landed the same hand that had been gently holding him not so gently across his backside.

"Daddy," Harry whined in response as he quickly hurried into his bed in an attempt to get his bum out of the line of fire.

"Absolutely not," James shook his head firmly. "We have talked about this eavesdropping habit of yours and I believe we agreed that it would stop did we not?"

Harry nodded as he hastily brushed a single tear from his cheek.

The swat hadn't hurt, not really. It was unusual though. His parents had rules that he was expected to follow and there were consequences to those rules but it had been quite some time since they had to be enforced.

"What Sirius and I discuss in private is absolutely none of your business," James said in a voice sterner than Harry was used to. "Am I clear?"

Harry quickly nodded hoping that his dad could see his action despite the darkness of the room. He didn't trust himself to speak without bursting into tears and in his opinion he was far too old for such a thing. Especially with his godfather right below him, he would be absolutely mortified if Sirius saw him crying over something so minor.

"This is your last warning," James said seriously. "If I catch you or hear of you eavesdropping again I will turn you over my knee for a proper spanking."

Harry blanched at the threat. His dad had only spanked him a handful of times in his life and he had absolutely no desire to experience it ever again.

"I won't," Harry promised in a soft voice.

Silence enveloped the dark room before James leaned over and placed a kiss on his son's forehead. "Good night," he said in his normal gentle tone. "Sleep well."

"Night dad," Harry replied.

He watched as his dad turned and walked out of the room, shutting the door behind him.

Without his consent his right hand traveled down to his bum and attempted to rub the sting out. He couldn't understand how earlier that morning he had fallen off his broom without shedding a tear yet his dad swatting him made him want to burst into a million tears.

He was thankful that his dad hadn't really lectured him or smacked him until they were in his room. He knew that had it happened on the staircase or even in the upstairs hallway that Sirius would have heard every last word. It didn't matter that Harry knew that his grandfather had disciplined both his dad and his godfather, if Sirius heard him getting into trouble he would be more ashamed than he knew how to handle.

Two weeks ago he had been scolded by his mum in front of his godfather. Harry had blushed nearly as red as Ron's hair but if Sirius had noticed he hadn't said anything. Harry had loved his godfather even more after that, an act that he wasn't even sure was possible.

Harry yawned as his bedroom door opened once more. Quickly he propped his upper body up on his elbows. A wide smile took over his face as he made out his visitors features despite the darkness.

"Harry James," Sirius said in a mock stern voice. "What is this I hear about you eavesdropping on a private conversation?"

"Sorry," Harry giggled. "I'll never do it again."

"See to it that you don't," Sirius went on as he wagged his finger at the child. "Next time I will be forced to hang you by your toenails from the ceiling for such misbehavior."

"Are my toenails long enough for that?" Harry asked in a curious voice.

"I will use a spell to make them grow and then hang you up there," Sirius threatened before he reached over and ruffled the boy's hair. "It's nearly midnight Bean," he said in a gentle tone. It was a nickname that only Sirius called him. From the time Harry could eat solid food he was obsessed with beans on toast for breakfast. Sirius would always joke with him that one day he was going to turn into a bean himself. At some point the joke had turned into a nickname. "Get some sleep," Sirius continued. "You'll need it if you plan on having a hope of beating me at Exploding Snap tomorrow."

"Can I ask you something first?"

"Anything," Sirius agreed with a grin.

"What's a secret keeper?"

Sirius felt his heart skip a beat at the question. The smile that had just been on is lips quickly vanished. He and James had hoped that Harry hadn't heard their conversation until after they were done discussing that particular topic.

"Sirius," Harry said in a soft voice after a moment of silence. "Are you mad that I asked that?"

"Not at all," Sirius quickly replied. He felt annoyed with himself that he had let his true feeling show. "It's…it is an immensely complex spell that involves concealing a secret inside of a single living soul. Information is given to this secret keeper and then it is impossible to find out unless the secret keeper tells someone."

Harry's eyes grew wide at the explanation.

"You must make me a promise though Bean. You must promise me that you will never tell anyone what you overheard tonight. Can I trust you to do that?"

Harry nodded quickly. "I promise," he replied feeling absolutely thrilled with the idea that his godfather trusted him with such information.

Sirius leaned over and placed a kiss on the boy's forehead. "I know that I can trust you."

A wide smile spread across Harry's face.

"Alright now to bed with you before your dad scolds me for keeping you up," Sirius chuckled.

Harry moved his elbows causing his head to hit his pillow.

Sirius took a hold of the boy's quilt and pulled it up over his shoulders. "I'll see you tomorrow," Sirius promised. "Love you kiddo."

"Love you Sirius."

 **TBC...**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you all so much for all the love and support on the first chapter of this story! Enjoy!**

* * *

"As always Darling the dessert choice is yours. What will it be this evening? Treacle tart or pudding?"

Harry grinned softly as he looked up at his grandmother. "Treacle tart please," he answered without a moment of hesitation.

"He's been brainwashed by Sirius," James laughed loudly as he leaned down and ruffled his son's hair. "His godfather has absolutely convinced him that treacle tart is the best dessert in the world."

Harry smiled once more but he did not deny his father's words. Harry never really cared what they had for dessert. He knew that if his grandmother was making it, it would be delicious regardless. He also knew that his godfather loved treacle tart. If it was an option presented to Harry, he always chose it.

"He's coming right?' Harry asked as his grandfather handed him a large book.

"Of course he is," Lydia smiled widely. "He knows better than to miss a Sunday night dinner. I didn't raise him to do such things."

"Another book on dragons?" Lily smiled as Harry opened the book his grandfather had given him and flipped through the pages.

"Really dad you're going to have him running off to Romania before he turns ten," James chuckled.

"There is nothing wrong with a curious mind," Charles replied. "As I recall you had quite the obsession with trolls when you were young and I don't remember you running off to the Polish border to live with them."

"I think it's great," Harry spoke up as he studied a picture of a river troll. "Thanks Grandad!"

"You are very welcome," Charles smiled as he sat down in his armchair.

"Have you spoken to your brother?" Lydia asked in a slight concerned voice as she glanced up at the clock. "He didn't say he wasn't coming did he?"

Sirius was nearly twenty minutes late. James couldn't help but worry that something had happened. The world was going mental at the moment. Five minutes late and he would have worried. At twenty he was beginning to feel his heart skip beats.

"He was over last night," Harry answered for his father without bothering to look up from the book.

"I'm sure he's just lost track of time," Lily insisted. "I could help you with dinner if you like mum."

"Dinner is all taken care of," Lydia replied. "It's just under a heating charm."

Lily reached her hand out and gently squeezed her husband's wrist. She could practically feel the tension radiating off of him.

"It's just with things the way that they are," Lydia spoke once more momentarily forgetting that her grandson was present. "Being forced to live under so many protective spells and to stop attending social gatherings…I can't help but worry about him."

"It may be time to reconsider these dinners altogether," Charles said softly.

"Absolutely not!" Lydia said sternly causing Harry to look up from his book. "They are more important now than they ever were."

"There is a war going on Love," Charles tried. "Protecting –"

"Dad," James cut his father off before he could finish his thought. "Not now please."

Charles eyes slowly drifted down to his godson who was sprawled out on the parlor floor with the book in front of him.

"We'll discuss it later," Charles agreed.

The words left his mouth seconds before the floo roared to life.

"So sorry that I am late," Sirius smiled as he appeared in the fireplace.

"Oh thank Merlin," Lydia breathed a sigh of relief as Harry jumped up and practically flung himself into his godfather's arms.

"I got a bit tied up in a few things," Sirius said as placed Harry back on the ground. "I would have sent word but by the time I realized how late I was I was nearly done and on my way."

"Can we go for a quick fly before dinner?" Harry asked his godfather in an excited voice. "Please?"

"Harry don't pester Sirius, he just got here," Lily instructed.

"He could never pester me," Sirius grinned. "And I would love to go for a fly with you. However it's not me that you have to ask."

"Please Granny?" Harry asked his attention now fully on his grandmother. "Just ten minutes! Please?"

"Yes please mum?" Sirius begged alongside his godson in the most energetic voice that he could muster.

"Go on then," she agreed with a chuckle. "Ten minutes and then the two of you best be on the ground and inside washing up or I'll come up there myself and get you."

Harry giggled at her threat before thanking her and racing out of the room with his godfather only a step behind him.

"Sometimes I wonder who the bigger child is when the two of them are together," Charles mused with a smile.

"I used to have to beg him for hours to fly with me," James said. "He isn't fond of being in the air."

"Yes dear but you aren't Harry," Lily reminded her husband. "I don't think I've ever witnessed Sirius saying no to him about anything."

"Speaking of Harry overheard Sirius and I talking last night," James informed his parents. "He heard that Peter is now our secret keeper."

Charles shut his eyes tightly as he softly shook his head. "It will have to be changed." He paused for a moment before continuing, "You will have to be more careful about discussing things while Harry is present."

"He wasn't present," James replied. "It was well after he should have been asleep. He was caught eavesdropping. It should not be a problem in the future; I spelled out exactly what the consequence will be if he does so again."

"I hope you aren't referring to corporal punishment."

"Yes dad," James replied in a tired tone. "I am."

"I'm sure that a time out would work just as well," Charles declared. "Some time spent in the corner is plenty of punishment.

"Says the man that walloped me whenever it was needed," James mused softly.

"I hardly touched you," Charles replied.

James rolled his eyes as he laughed softly. The moment his parents became grandparents they had changed completely, suddenly deciding that spanking was completely barbaric.

"Regardless," Charles changed the subject entirely. "The secret keeper will still have to be changed."

"Perhaps not," Lydia said. "After all he is under such protection these days. He isn't even to visit with Ron is he?" She paused as Lily shook her head no. "Who is he going to tell then? The only interaction he has is with the people in this room and other adults that already know."

"Remus doesn't know," James pointed out. "Not that I wouldn't trust him to know but I hardly want to include him in a plan that could very likely put his life in danger."

"His life is already in danger," Lily pointed out in a gentle voice. "He is part of the Order, a decision that he made on his own."

"I think the best strategy here is to keep up good spirits for Harry," Charles spoke up. "Albus could just as likely be wrong."

James nodded in agreement although he couldn't remember ever thinking that his father was as wrong as he did now.

* * *

"Alright Bean, time to get down."

"Five more minutes?" Harry asked as he flew past his godfather.

"Your granny will wallop us both if we're late for dinner."

Harry made a face at these words before shaking his head. He didn't believe for a second that his grandmother would do anything of the sort.

"Let me just show you my new trick?" Harry negotiated. "Then we'll go in."

"That's a deal," Sirius agreed with a nod. He knew that James and Lily didn't approve of the crazy tricks that their son did on his broom. Technically he wasn't even old enough to be flying. He was a natural though. He took after his father in that sense. Sirius didn't see the harm in allowing him to try a few tricks. Besides, what were godfathers for if not to let their godsons misbehave a bit?

Sirius watched as Harry flew at top speed directly towards a tree. He nearly yelled out for his godson to be careful when at the last possible second Harry pulled his broom up causing himself to fly high above the branches.

"Brilliant!" Sirius laughed loudly. "Just bloody brilliant!"

Harry laughed at his godfather's choice of words as he flew back down to where the man was.

"Don't tell my dad okay?" Harry asked. He knew that doing so was pointless. Sirius never told on him for anything. About a year ago Sirius had taken him to Diagon Alley to meet up with the Weasley family. Despite the fact that Harry had been told about a million times by his parents that Knockturn Alley was dangerous, he had still snuck off and ventured down it with his best mate Ron. Luckily for the pair of them it had been Sirius who caught them. Ron was convinced that the man would tell his parents on him but Harry had been confident that his godfather wouldn't do anything of the sort. Harry had been right. After finding them Sirius had assured them that no one else knew where they had been and then treated them to some ice cream while he told them a story about how he had snuck down there when he was a boy to try and buy some pranks to take to school with him.

"I'm offended that you would even suggest that I might do so," Sirius replied in a mock hurt tone as the two of them descended from the sky.

"You can never be too careful," Harry replied with a smirk, "especially with old people."

"You cheeky little mongrel," Sirius chuckled as he grabbed his godson around the waist and tickled his sides.

"Stop," Harry shrieked with glee.

Sirius grabbed hold of both of their brooms and threw them into the air causing them to float gently towards the back door and prop themselves up against the house. In one quick motion he flung his godson over his shoulder and continued to tickle him.

"Stop," Harry shrieked once more. "Don't!"

"Don't stop?" Sirius questioned in a grave tone. "A strange request Bean but I promise you that I won't."

"Sirius!" Harry laughed loudly as he squirmed in an attempt to free himself.

A second later Sirius removed the child from this shoulder, flipped him around, and placed him firmly onto the ground in front of him.

"I'll race you inside," Harry challenged the man.

"Hold on one second," Sirius replied as he motioned over to the small bench that sat under the large oak tree. "I want to have a quick chat with you about something first."

Harry sat down next to his godfather and looked up at the man expectantly.

"I know that we touched on this last night but I wanted to remind you how very important it is to keep the information that you heard last night to yourself," Sirius said in a tone that he hoped conveyed the gravity of the matter but didn't sound too much like a lecture. Sirius Black did not lecture his godson. The very idea of it was laughable.

"I know," Harry nodded earnestly. "I promised you that I would remember?"

"I remember," Sirius replied. He couldn't help but wonder if it was truly that simple to an eight year old. A promise was made so a promise must be kept. Sirius couldn't recall the age of eight. It was an age he would have rather have forgotten altogether. He was also nearly certain that he didn't know anything about friendship until he found James. Throughout his life James often told him that he was the best friend he had ever had but Sirius was sure that it was James himself that molded him into that friend. He certainly didn't learn anything about it from his parents.

"I won't tell anyone," Harry assured his godfather. "Not even Peter and it's about him!"

"Well he knows," Sirius swallowed a chuckle. "But no it's best you don't discuss it with him or anyone."

"A promise is a promise," Harry said.

Sirius smiled softly at his godson. "You are absolutely right, a promise is a promise."

"Yep. So can we race inside now?"

"You'll have to give me a head start," Sirius negotiated. "I don't know how you always manage to win but today I am claiming the title of being the fastest."

Harry rolled his eyes as he jumped to his feet and took off in a run for the house.

* * *

Albus Dumbledore stood in the tower looking out over the grounds of Hogwarts.

To say that he had been shocked when he received the letter earlier in the day would have been an understatement. Having not spoken to the man in nearly a decade Albus did not expect the man to reach out to him. Now with his visitor standing behind him begging for forgiveness and help his shock was gone and replaced with anguish.

He had known of the Prophecy. Of course he had not filled the Potters in on all of the details. He did not see the need. There was no solid proof that the child it referred to was Harry. Simply telling them to go into hiding and placing every protective spell known on them was satisfactory in his opinion. Telling them the details as to why could create a panic. In his experience, panic typically brought on hasty decisions.

"You know what he is capable of. He is absolutely convinced that her son is the child the Prophecy speaks of. He will not stop until he has killed the child and he will destroy anyone who tries to stop him."

Albus' mind raced over the protection measures that had been given to the Potters. Houses being relocated and secured, protective spells being cast four hours on end.

"The Dark Lord will not rest until he finds them."

"What do you propose is done?"

"Hide them," Severus begged. "Please. I will give you anything in return. Just please, hide them."

Albus could easily see the emotion in the man. A blind man could see that he had been crying before he had arrived. Even now, he appeared to be on the verge of tears at any given moment.

"The entire Potter family is in hiding Severus," Albus confided in him taking pity on the man. "James, Lily, Harry, Sirius, even his parents. They travel between their three houses and nowhere else. The level of protection on them is astronomical. I could not take someone to them if I wanted to."

"Thank you," Severus breathed as he exhaled a large sigh of relief.

* * *

"Did you have a good day?" Lily asked as she pulled the quilt up tightly around her only child. It was a question that she asked nightly. She always felt that it was good practice to talk to her child about his day. She wanted him to be sure that he knew that his thoughts and feelings were just as important as anyone else's.

"Brilliant," Harry replied as he shifted his body trying to get comfortable. Despite the fact that it was nearly an hour past his normal bedtime he still felt wide awake. "Is daddy going to come up and say goodnight too?"

James and Sirius were downstairs in the study. They had let Harry join them for the first two hours of their visit in hopes that doing so would deter the child from sneaking out of bed, eavesdropping, and putting himself in a bad position.

"I'm sure he will once Sirius has gone."

"I'll be asleep by then," Harry replied as his mum sat on the edge of his bed.

"That doesn't change the fact that he will still tuck you in," Lily smiled as she reached out and ran her hand down her son's small cheek. "Did you have fun playing with Sirius at Granny and Grandads?"

Harry nodded with a grin. "I always have fun with him."

"I know that he talked with you about what you overheard last night and I know that he explained that it is very important that you don't tell anyone about it." Lily tried to keep her voice light and carefree as it normally was. She didn't want to put pressure on her son. She didn't want him to realize the importance of what he knew.

"I promised Sirius that I wouldn't talk about it," Harry replied solemnly. "Not even with you mum."

Lily couldn't help the small giggle that escaped her mouth. "Well okay then, I won't say another word about it." She withdrew her hand from Harry's face and pretended to zip her lips shut.

"Mum?" Harry asked in a soft voice. "What did grandad mean when he said that we shouldn't go there anymore? Is he mad at us for something?"

Lily sighed softly before shaking her head. "Not at all Darling. No one is cross with anyone else." She paused for a moment as she collected her thoughts in an attempt to explain things to her child so that he would understand. "There is a war going on at the moment. It isn't something that you should worry yourself over at all but when wars happen sometimes traveling is much harder than it should be."

"Is that why Remus and Peter never come over anymore? And why I can't go visit Ron?"

Lily nodded sadly. "Exactly. When the war is over things will go back to normal for us all."

"Are we winning the war?" Harry asked with a small yawn.

"I believe we are," Lily replied honestly. "I believe that in the end, good always wins Harry. It is important that you remember that. When you are older and even now, when struggling between doing what is right and good and what is easy, right and good will always win."

Harry nodded his understanding as he yawned once more.

"Now young Sir I believe it is time for bed." She stood up as she pulled the quilt up over his shoulders once more. "And tonight we will stay in bed where we belong correct?"

Harry nodded as he felt his cheeks burn slightly at her reminder. He didn't forget what his dad had promised would happen if he got caught eavesdropping again.

"Good," Lily replied as she leaned down and placed a single kiss on her son's cheek. "You have your math and reading lessons with me in the morning so be sure to sleep well Darling."

"Night mum," Harry yawned once more. "Love you."

"Goodnight Sweetheart. I love you very much."

* * *

"Lils is going to mention it to him while she tucks him in as well," James said as he poured himself a glass of firewhisky.

"I spoke to him about it again today. He promised me that he wouldn't tell anyone." Sirius paused for a moment taking a drink of the dark liquor before continuing. "Funny how that works with kids isn't it? You make a promise and that's it; as if it's legal and bonding."

"I know," James nodded. "In some instances anyway. He promised me he would no longer eavesdrop and you see how well that promise was kept last night."

"He's curious," Sirius excused the behavior. "It's likely hard for him to know we are down here talking and he can't be included."

"You would make an excuse for him if he murdered someone wouldn't you?" James couldn't help but ask as he sat in the large armchair next to his brother.

"That all depends," Sirius replied seriously. "Did he have good reason for doing so or not?"

James snickered at the response. "I sincerely hope that my son knows how fortunate he is to have you in his life however if I catch him eavesdropping again you will not be able to save his bum Siri."

"As much as we hated that as children," Sirius mused. "I don't know how you can do it."

"It did the trick for keeping us out of mischief most of the time," James reasoned. "As well as taught us right from wrong and instilled what real consequences were."

"I suppose," Sirius replied before taking another sip of his drink. "Are you both going to be able to attend the meeting tomorrow night?"

"Lils wants to ask my parents to take Harry so we both can but I'm not so sure it's for the best. Merlin forbid these meetings are discovered. Harry could be left without either of his parents. I can't even fathom that thought."

Sirius nodded his understanding. He could easily see the stress that had suddenly appeared on his brother's face. Over the past few weeks it seemed to come and go as quickly as a smile could. Sirius couldn't help but want to cause it to fade every time he spotted it.

"Remember the first time we drank this stuff in the Room of Requirement? It amazes me to this day that we never got caught," Sirius reminisced.

"We were caught that time at the seaside," James reminded him. "I think the walloping we got that night more than made up for both instances."

Sirius nearly winced at the memory. Their father had made them a disgusting potion to drink that had quickly relieved them of any effects of the alcohol that they were feeling before sending James to fetch the slipper. It was one of the very few times that he had delivered their punishment in the same room. Sirius remembered James stalling so much that their dad added extra punishment to his dose. The helping of fudge that their mum had snuck up to them afterwards was one of the largest Sirius had ever seen.

"If you would have just done as dad asked…."

"Oh you're one to talk," James laughed, "as if you never attempted to stall or talk your way out of things."

"Just once," Sirius replied. He finished off his drink placing the now empty glass on the coffee table in front of him. "It's getting late. I should be going."

"I know you promised Harry that you would stop by to play a game of Exploding Snap with him tomorrow afternoon but please don't feel obligated to."

"A promise is a promise," Sirius replied with a grin repeating the words that his godson had said to him earlier in the day.

"He's a lucky, lucky boy Sirius," James responded. "And so am I."

 **TBC...**


	3. Chapter 3

**Enjoy!**

* * *

"Be mindful of your spelling," Lily said gently as she peered over at her son's work. "Just there you have the wrong spelling of the word 'to' for it to be a number." She pointed at the word.

"The one with a W in it?" Harry asked. Although it was a question Lily could hear the confidence in her child's tone.

"Correct," she beamed. "Fix it on your paper so that we can move on to history."

Harry dipped his quill once more before putting a single line through the incorrect spelling and writing the correct version above it. His mum had been teaching him for as long as he could remember. He knew that most of his friends hated their lessons but Harry actually quite enjoyed them. His mum was always so patient and kind about everything. Plus she knew loads about so many interesting things. Harry was sure that she was the smartest mum in the whole world.

"Very good," Lily smiled at her son. "You've been practicing your handwriting too haven't you?"

Harry nodded with a grin. She was always telling him that it didn't matter how smart he was if no one could read his writing to see for themselves. Over the past few days he had been writing out his letters every night after dinner. She had been right too, practice did help.

"It looks nearly a hundred times more legible," she praised him as she opened up her muggle history book. She knew a lot of other mothers that skipped over Muggle Studies completely, who concentrated on the bare minimum that children needed to know in order to start at Hogwarts. Lily felt that doing so was foolish. Any child of hers was going to learn as much as they possibly could. It helped that Harry enjoyed learning as well, both about their world and the muggle world.

She flipped through the pages looking for the part in the Middle Ages where they had left off.

"Mum?" Harry asked as she flipped past a section covered in pictures of battle.

"Hmm?"

"Can we talk about war?"

Lily held her breath for a moment. She would have liked to discuss just about any topic but war at the moment. Still, she knew that her son had questions. She knew that hiding things from him or trying to keep things from him wouldn't help the matter. If anything doing so would only spark even more interest in her overly curious eight year old. And that was the last thing that anyone wanted.

"We can," she forced her tone to stay light and airy.

"What makes a war happen?"

"We've discussed that before Love, a few times if I remember correctly. When people cannot come to an agreement or when someone is trying to become a dictator and take power over a group of people forcing their beliefs on them wars can start."

"But why can't people just talk and work it out before a war starts?" Harry asked in a curious voice.

"Well sometimes they try and do that but it isn't possible. As I've told you before, it is so very important to fight for what is right – for what you believe in."

Harry nodded silently. His mum and dad were always reminding him of that. He must have heard it at least once a day, if not more.

"What do you think about the war that is going on?" Lily asked in a gentle voice. She silently scolded herself as she realized that it had been quite some time since she had asked this question. She believed in making sure that she knew her child's feelings as often as possible. She never wanted to assume that she understood what he felt but rather she wanted to know for certain so that she could help if possible.

Harry shrugged. He sat in silence for a moment before opening his mouth. "I think it's sort of dumb," he finally replied. "I get the fighting for what you believe in but we can't go anywhere."

"You are going to the Burrow tomorrow," she reminded him. After filling her husband in on the conversation that she and Harry had had the previous night, James had spent the better part of the morning fighting for his son's right to a normal life despite the war. After setting about a million protective spells into place a play date for Harry and Ron had somehow been granted. It was against her better judgment to let Harry go. James was insistent that their son would be just fine and Lily was confident that Arthur and Molly were skilled enough to handle any issues or mishaps. Still, Lily was certain that she wouldn't be able to breathe until the play date was over and Harry was home safe.

"I know," he replied. "And I'm happy about it but everyone is scared all the time."

"Everyone who?" She questioned. She regretted the question the moment it left her mouth. She knew the answer. Her son was right, everyone was scared all of the time.

"Everyone mum," Harry replied with a soft sigh. "Granny, Grandad, you, Remus, Peter. I think even daddy sometimes."

Lily instantly noted that Sirius wasn't included in the list. At first she was surprised but she quickly realized how silly her reaction was. Harry thought the world of his godfather. Lily was sure that in her eight year old's eyes Sirius was some sort of super hero, far less destructible than the common man.

"Are you afraid?" Lily asked in a soft voice.

Harry shrugged and then paused before nodding quietly.

"That we will lose the war?" Lily questioned.

"Yeah," Harry agreed. "Or that something will happen to one of you."

Lily was overcome with the urge to promise that nothing would happen to any of them. She would not lie to her child though. She would not make a promise that she could not keep.

"I've told you before Darling, the war isn't something that you should allow to bother you." Even as she said the words she knew how foolish they were. Not being bothered by something so large was a near impossible task, even for a carefree child.

"I know," Harry replied. "And I try not to think about it."

"I think perhaps some time with your friends will help," Lily forced a smile. "Some time away from all us boring adults."

"You aren't boring mum," Harry replied with a mischievous grin, "but daddy is sometimes."

Lily chuckled softly as she closed the history book. "I think on that note our lessons for today can end."

"Can I fly for a little bit before lunch?" Harry asked in an excited voice.

"A quarter of an hour," Lily agreed. "And none of your crazy tricks or I will make you eat liver and onions for lunch."

Harry made a disgusted face at her words before jumping out of his chair and dashing out of the room.

* * *

"Don't be upset with me Lils."

She raised her eyebrows at him in a pointed look as she fought the urge to let her temper get the best of her, exploding in his direction.

"I certainly don't think that you aren't more than capable of handling the situation. Hell, you are likely more capable than I am."

"Don't try and fix this with flattery," she said as she glanced out the window to check on her son who was flying around the backyard.

"I'm not," James shook his head as he reached out and placed his hand on her arm. She quickly brushed him off causing him to sigh softly. "You know the reasoning," he said in a much softer voice. "If something were to happen to both of us…" he trailed off clearing his throat before his emotions could get the better of him. "I can't imagine a worse fate for Harry," he finished a moment later.

"I know," she agreed. She did know but it did not make her job of playing the quiet wife and mother sitting at home any easier. The last thing she wanted in the world was for Harry to suffer in any way. Still, she wasn't built for being in the background. As far as she was concerned if there was a war to fight she belonged on the front line.

"I will be fine," he assured her. "I promise you that I will."

"Do not for a second make promises to me that you do not have the power to keep," she replied in a sad voice. "Anything could happen at any moment and you know it. We may be safe at home but the moment we venture into the world we are a target."

"I cannot miss the meeting. You know that I can't."

She nodded in reply as she swallowed a lump in her throat. She had promised herself over a week ago that she wouldn't shed any more tears over this particular subject. Crying wouldn't help anything.

Gently James wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her close to him. "I will not promise you that I will be fine but I will promise that I will love you with all my heart for the rest of this life and into the next."

She smiled softly as she leaned towards him and gently kissed his lips. "I love you," she whispered. "You have my whole heart."

* * *

"You lose again," Harry laughed as he picked up a small stack of cards.

"Are you letting him win?" James questioned as he leaned against the counter behind his son. "Or have you really become that bad at this game?"

"I swear I'm not," Sirius replied in a solemn voice. "He is just playing exceptionally well tonight. And I take great offense to your words Jamie," Sirius said with a small grin. "I could still beat you if you had the courage to play against me."

James rolled his eyes before he turned his attention to his son. "Are you cheating?" James asked Harry with a small chuckle of disbelief.

"No!" Harry exclaimed. "How could I? I can't make his cards explode."

Sirius quickly shuffled his cards in his hand before he and Harry threw down a card once more. Seconds later, his card exploded on the table causing a small puff of smoke to form.

Harry giggled loudly in reply.

"You little mongrel," Sirius said in a mock stern voice.

Harry erupted into laughter. "It's not my fault!"

"Last game," James announced glancing up at the clock. "Sirius and I have to go soon."

"How come mum isn't going?" Harry asked through his giggles as another one of his godfather's cards exploded.

"She is staying home with you," James replied as he walked across the kitchen and pulled a butterbeer from the refrigerator. He motioned to Sirius and his son who both shook their heads no.

"But usually she goes and I stay with granny and grandad. Is it because of what they said about not going places?"

Sirius watched as James struggled to answer his son.

"Do you remember when we used to call this game Exploding Snape after old Snivellus?" Sirius asked effectively changing the subject.

"Who?" Harry questioned.

"A boy we went to school with," James replied. "His name was Severus Snape and when we were younger and much more immature," he paused as he gave Sirius a pointed look, "we called the game Exploding Snape."

"Your father even made little figures of Snivellus once and we exploded them for fun," Sirius laughed.

"You did?" Harry asked in a surprised voice.

James suppressed his laughter as he drank a swallow of his butterbeer. "We were young Harry and it all in good fun. It wasn't done in a malicious way."

Harry watched as his godfather nearly choked trying to hold in his laughter.

"Bath time young Sir," Lily announced as she walked into the kitchen. A large fluffy blue towel was draped over her right arm.

"After this game," Harry replied as he shuffled the stack of cards in his hand.

Lily opened her mouth to scold her son but her husband beat her to it.

"Do not speak to your mother that way," James said sternly. "You will ask her if it is okay to finish your game first." He gave his son an unrelenting look as Harry's cheeks blushed.

"Sorry mum," he said softly completely embarrassed at being scolded in front of his godfather. "Can me and Sirius finish our game first?" He was silent for a moment before he hastily added, "Please."

"Five minutes," Lily replied. "And then it is bath time, no excuses."

"Okay," Harry agreed. He waited until his mum left the room before he turned to his dad. "Sorry."

"Quite alright," James nodded before finishing off his butterbeer.

"My next card is going to dominate yours," Sirius threatened with a grin. "Give me your best Bean!"

Harry smiled softly at his godfather as he threw down his card. Not a mention of the scolding he had just been on the receiving end of. Not a reminder to speak to his parents nicer. Just right back to their game as if nothing had ever happened.

Harry was sure that a cooler adult had never lived.

* * *

"What time will daddy be home?" Harry asked as he pulled his pajama shirt over his head.

"Long after you are asleep I am afraid. He will be home in the morning before you go to the Burrow." She resisted the urge to have her son change into pajamas that matched. In the past few months she had begun allowing him to pick his own clothes. She knew that doing so was good for his independence as well as his confidence. Her own perfectionism was suffering a bit in the process though.

"What time am I going to the Burrow?" Harry questioned as he pulled the quilt down on his bed.

"After lunch," she replied. "And do not even think about climbing into that bed until you pick up your wet towel and put it in your dirty clothes bin."

Harry took two steps backwards before turning and picking up his towel. He was surprised that he had forgotten. He knew that leaving dirty laundry on the floor was his mum's biggest pet peeve.

"Thank you," she smiled as he deposited the towel into the bin and walked back across the room.

"Isn't there a spell that could just clean up my floor for me?" Harry asked as he climbed into his bed.

"And what exactly would that teach you?" Lily questioned with a quirky grin. "I am not in the business of raising lazy children."

Harry often questioned his parents as to why they didn't use magic for more daily tasks. They were both adamant that although magic was wonderful, relying on it for every mundane duty only made one lazy. His mum especially often reminded him that she had been raised by muggles and hadn't had the luxury of using magic for anything in her childhood.

"It would make you happy," Harry concluded.

Lily chuckled softly as she pulled the blankets up around her child. She sat on the edge of his bed before answering. "I suppose it would but it makes me happier to know that I am raising a responsible, self-sufficient child." Lily's thoughts instantly drifted to her only nephew. It amazed her that she and her sister had been raised by the same parents. They had such different views on how to raise their own children. Although it was a rare occurrence that the two families spent time together, she was forever thankful that when they did Dudley's behavior didn't rub off on Harry. James often confided in her that Dudley would benefit from a trip over someone's knee. Lily couldn't say that she disagreed either.

"Since I'm not at Granny and Grandad's does that mean that they went to the meeting?" Harry asked changing the subject completely.

Lily shook her head. "They don't attend the meetings Love."

Harry mulled over her response for a moment before changing the subject once more.

"Can I wait up for daddy and Sirius?"

"I'm afraid not. As I said, they won't be home until much too late."

"I can do it," Harry said in self-assured voice. "One time I stayed up until almost midnight with Fred and George. Even Ron fell asleep."

"I do not doubt that you could," Lily smiled softly. "However if you plan on having the energy to keep up with your friends tomorrow you will need your sleep tonight."

Harry scrunched up his nose at this response before nodding in agreement. "I guess you are right."

"Your mother is always right," Lily giggled. "And don't let daddy ever tell you any different." She leaned over and placed a kiss on his forehead. "Now I believe it is time for you go to sleep."

"I'm not even tired," Harry complained as he lay back on his pillow and rolled onto his side.

"Well I'm sorry to hear that," Lily replied in a sympathetic voice. "But I don't make the rules."

"Yes you do," Harry argued with a small snicker.

"I don't," she insisted. "All the eight year old's in the world need to be asleep by half past eight. If it were up to me I would let you stay up and play and eat ice cream until the sun came up."

Harry made a face as he rolled his eyes at her. "Mum."

"You'll see one day when you have children of your own. You will receive a very official letter in the mail. If I don't make sure you are in bed by the time you should be I will have to pay a hefty fine."

"Ron stays up later than me and he is eight too!" Harry shrieked with glee.

"I'll have to speak to Molly about that, perhaps things are different in her household because she has older children. I am sure that tracking them all would be impossible. They likely just follow the rules for the oldest and assume that the others are following their own distinct rules as well."

"You're being silly," Harry replied through a yawn.

"Was that a yawn?" Lily questioned in a mock serious voice. "Hurry and give into it before it gets too late and a bill arrives in the mail tomorrow."

"Stop," Harry insisted with a small laugh. "Be normal again."

"Oh Darling I'm afraid I've never been normal, nor are you, a fact that I am quite proud of."

Harry smiled softly at her words. "You know what I mean."

"I do and I will stop but you are still going to sleep. We need to work on some spelling in the morning and I need that magnificent brain of yours well rested for that."

Harry yawned once more as he nodded in reply.

"I love you very much," she said softly as she leaned over and kissed his forehead once more. "Sleep well."

"I love you too," Harry replied as his eyes began to grow heavy. "Leave my door open a crack okay?"

"Of course," she nodded as she stood. She waved her hand causing the light in the room to dim a considerable amount.

"And tell daddy to come in when he gets home?" Harry requested in a tired voice.

"Absolutely," Lily agreed as Harry drifted off to sleep.

 **TBC...**


	4. Chapter 4

**Enjoy!**

* * *

"While your spelling is absolutely superb, you need to watch the spacing of your letters. When they are too close together it makes reading your brilliant work a challenge."

Harry nodded as he chewed on his bottom lip with determination as he wrote out his next word careful to be more mindful of the small spaces between the letters on his parchment.

"Much better," Lily nodded with a small smile.

Harry returned the grin. "Are we doing other lessons today or just spelling?"

"Perhaps arithmetic," Lily replied. "We will have to see how much time we have."

"Before I go to Ron's?" Harry asked with a small smile.

"Before we have lunch," Lily corrected him. She swallowed hard before continuing, "and then yes, before you go to Ron's."

The words nearly pained her to say. She knew that despite the actions of the world around them she needed to allow Harry to have as much normalcy as he could. There was a time when Harry and Ron were able to have a playdate nearly every week and now the two of them hadn't seen each other in weeks. She wanted her son to be as safe as possible but she also wanted him to have the life he deserved. Being cooped up in the house surrounded by adults night and day was hardly ideal for a rambunctious eight year old.

Harry gave her a cheesy grin before moving on to his next spelling word. He dipped his quill in the small inkwell before carefully writing the word on his parchment.

Harry was deep in concentration when he heard the floo roar to life in the parlor.

"Lils," James voice hollered from the other room. "Can you come here please?"

Harry looked up at his mum. He knew the tone of voice that his dad had used. He sounded upset or worried - neither of those emotions sitting well with Harry.

"Stay here and continue your work," Lily instructed her son as she stood. "I'll be back in just a moment to check it."

She slipped through the doorway to the parlor, careful to close the door tightly behind her.

"What is it?" She asked in a hushed but worried voice. "Is everyone okay? Your parents? Sirius? Remus? Peter?"

James quickly nodded. He didn't want to worry her a moment more. He absolutely hated that they were living in a world where questioning the safety of their closest friends had become a daily routine. "There was an attack," James informed her. "Early this morning at Diagon Alley, nearly ten people were murdered."

Lily felt her heart rush into her throat. She wanted nothing more than to give into the tears that had suddenly rushed to the surface. However, she had learned months ago that crying would not change a thing.

"I don't think that Harry should go today," James said shocking Lily with his words.

James had been adamant about Harry's need to go to the Burrow since the first mention of it.

"You think it is too dangerous?" Lily asked in a voice just barely above a whisper.

James was silent as he pushed his hand through his hair. A moment later he cleared his throat. "I think that this attack was one of the worst yet. These people were just shopping. They were not on any sort of hit list."

"Unlike us," Lily interjected.

"Unlike we _may_ be," James corrected her gently. "I know that Harry needs to be able to live his life Lils but we cannot send him out there with the possibility that he may never come home."

The tears that Lily had been trying so hard to fight off now rimmed her eyelids. "I never wanted him to go in the first place," Lily admitted. "I have been dreading allowing him to leave."

* * *

Harry finished writing his last word and then placed his quill in the inkwell. Slowly he slid off of his chair, his sock clad feet making contact with the hardwood floor.

He knew that he was taking a big chance. He could hear his heart thumping against his chest as his dad's threat ran through his head.

He quickly walked across the room and carefully leaned against the door to the parlor, pressing his ear tightly against it.

* * *

"Not one of them posed a threat," James said in a sad voice. "They were just out shopping and they were destroyed."

Lily shut her eyes tightly as she took a deep breath. "We knew that things were going to get worse before they got better. You told me that yourself."

"I know that I did," James nodded. "However I am not prepared to let him go during all of this. I'm sure that I am being far too protective. I am sure that he would be just as safe as he will be here but I cannot allow Harry to go to the Burrow today - _we_ cannot allow it."

Lily nodded in agreement. She opened her mouth to reply but before she could get a word out the door to the dining room swung open revealing their eight year old, tears already threatening to fall.

"Daddy no!" Harry shouted. "Please let me go!"

" _Harry James_ ," James scolded in a stern voice. "I thought that we had discussed the consequences of your eavesdropping?"

"I don't care," Harry replied the tears now streaming down his face. "I want to go to Ron's. You said that I could! You both did!"

"Try and understand Love it's just not safe," Lily said gently. She could see how disappointed James was in Harry's behavior. She did not disagree with her husband, their child's sheer lack for other people's privacy needed to be corrected. That being said, she did not feel as though Harry throwing a full on tantrum would help his position any and if she could diffuse the situation she was sure that it could only help.

"Nothing is safe!" Harry yelled as he stomped his foot in frustration. "I hate this war."

"So do I," James answered in a much calmer voice than he had used only seconds earlier. "We all do. But our dislike of it does not mean that we can let our guard down and put ourselves in dangerous situations."

"But I want to go," Harry said in a desperate whine. A moment later he was across the room leaning into Lily's side, his face hidden in her shirt.

Lily's right hand gently rubbed his back.

"I know that you want to go but unfortunately we cannot always get everything that we want," James said gently.

"Can Ron come here?"

"I'm afraid not Love," Lily said softly. She silently prayed that she would not have to explain her words. She could not tell her eight year old that their house was far too dangerous to allow his best mate to come play.

"This isn't fair," Harry whined.

"Unfortunately life is not always fair," Lily replied in a sad voice.

"Mum is right," James said in a soft voice. "And while it is certainly acceptable for you to be disappointed and even to voice your feelings on this matter it is not okay that you eavesdropped on our conversation."

"I'm sorry," Harry replied through his tears as he pulled his face out of his mum's shirt to look at his dad. "I didn't mean it."

James was sure that he could feel his heart breaking just a bit. He knew that he had to follow through on his promise. Not doing so would send the wrong message to his son entirely. Aside from that he knew that eventually Harry's blatant lack of respect for other people's privacy was an issue that would get his son in real trouble.

Still, he hated the idea of punishing his son. He hated it under normal circumstances. He despised the idea of doing so when Harry was already disappointed in the day's events and crying as though he had already been thoroughly punished.

"I think it would be best if you went to your room Harry," James instructed. "I will be up in just a moment."

"Daddy," Harry whined in a pitiful tone.

"Absolutely not," James shook his head. "You have had plenty of warnings. Now upstairs with you."

A loud pitiful sob escaped Harry's mouth before he turned and ran towards the staircase.

"James…"

"Don't tell me that you think he shouldn't be punished?" James asked in an appalled voice. "You know how many times he has been warned Lils."

"No I don't think that," Lily replied. "I just feel for him. Despite being the cheeky little brat that he is…" she paused for a moment before sighing softly. "He just wants to play with his friend. He is scared, he has admitted that to me more than once. I just feel for him."

James' eye's locked with his wife's before he nodded once in agreement. "I will talk to him. Try and explain things a bit better. I'm going to go up now though, I know from experience that the waiting is the worst part and I can't bear to make him wait much longer."

"You are a good daddy," Lily said softly. It was a phrase that she fully believed and one that she reminded her husband of when he was met with a difficult task of fatherhood.

* * *

James climbed the staircase slowly.

The moment he and Lily had married James had wanted nothing more than to be a father - a daddy. He made sure to always make time for Harry regardless of what else was demanding his attention. He made sure to talk to him and treat him like an actual person and not just a child. He played whatever game Harry wanted to as often as he could. He taught him all that he could about life.

James thrived at being a father.

Unfortunately, not every aspect that fatherhood required was easy. Unlike his own mum who had so rarely punished him, Lily had no problem taking on her share of the disciplinarian role when needed. And James was quite thankful for that.

James hated being the disciplinarian. He hated having to follow through on his words regardless of whether or not he knew that he was doing the right thing.

James paused for a brief moment outside of his son's door. Slowly he raised his right hand and knocked once before pushing the door open.

He had expected to find Harry on his bed, still a sobbing mess.

What he didn't expect was to find the room completely empty.

James turned on his heel and rushed down the hall. He flung open the bathroom door to find that empty as well.

"Harry?" He called out. "Harry where are you?"

"James?" Lily called up the stairs. "Is everything okay?"

"He's not up here," James called back now unable to keep the panic out of his voice.

Lily raced up the staircase. She could feel her breakfast sloshing around in her stomach. Her heart was beating loudly in her ears.

"Harry," James called out once more. "Harry James if you are hiding I promise you that…" he paused as he forced himself to calm down. "Harry," he said in a much calmer tone. "If you are here please come out and show yourself."

* * *

"Sirius," Harry called out as he stood in the familiar parlor.

"Bean?" Sirius' voice came from the kitchen.

A moment later his godfather came rushing around the corner and into the parlor. "What are you doing here?" He paused as he took in the tear stained face that his godson was sporting. A moment later he was across the room. "What's wrong? Are you okay? James, Lily are they okay?"

Harry quickly nodded. He had never seen his godfather quite as worried as he just had. He was starting to think that maybe running off to Sirius' house wasn't the best idea.

"What are you doing here?" Sirius asked in a gentle voice as he squatted down in front of the boy. "And why the tears?"

"I'm not crying," Harry replied in an embarrassed voice. His tears had stopped just before he had stepped into the fireplace in his parent's bedroom. He had forced them to do so. Crying in front of Sirius was not an option.

"I'm sorry. It looked as though you were but clearly I was mistaken," Sirius said. "Now once more. What are you doing here?"

In the time that it had taken him to travel from his own parlor to his parents' room he had concocted a story about his parents sending him to his godfather so that the man could deliver him to the Burrow. Now that he was face to face with his godfather though he couldn't lie.

Not to Sirius.

"I was supposed to go to Ron's," Harry said in a soft voice.

"And you accidently ended up here?" Sirius asked in a confusion. "Your parents let you use the floo alone?"

Harry shook his head. He couldn't find his voice. He didn't know how to explain to his godfather that he had done what he had.

"Bean I'm trying to understand here I really am but you need to help me," Sirius replied.

Harry could easily see the concern in his godfather's eyes. It was a rare emotion for Sirius to direct towards Harry.

"I was supposed to go and then they said that I couldn't," Harry said whining a bit in the process.

"Who said? Your parents?"

Harry nodded.

"Please tell me that they know that you are here?"

There was something else in Sirius' voice now. Something that Harry hadn't heard before. He wasn't sure if it was fear or anger but he knew he didn't like it.

Harry's two front teeth bit down on his lower lip as he shook his head.

Silence reigned as Sirius took several deep breaths.

"I'm sorry," Harry offered in a small voice. He blinked rapidly as he forced the tears that were threatening to fall once more to remain at bay.

"No I am sorry Bean," Sirius replied gently. "I'm sorry because I know that you came here thinking that I could help you in some way but I just can't. If your parents said that you can't go then they have good reason."

"It's all because of the stupid war."

"While it certainly is stupid it doesn't change the fact that it is very real and traveling right now is very dangerous which is why I also need to take you home."

"Can't I stay with you?" Harry asked as his eyes filled up with tears without his consent.

"I'm afraid not Bean," Sirius replied sadly. "Your parents are probably sick with worry." He slowly stood up and walked towards the fireplace, ruffling Harry's hair as he walked past him.

"I'm going to be in huge trouble," Harry practically whispered. He blinked rapidly forcing the tears away.

Sirius nearly tried to convince the child that he would be able to talk James and Lily out of any punishment but he stopped himself before the words came out. He knew James better than he knew anyone - better than he knew himself. If his godson was ever in danger of being in serious trouble with his parents, this was it.

"You are likely right about that but honestly Harry you couldn't have actually believed that this plan would work," Sirius said in a voice much gentler than his normal cheerful tone. "You had to have known that I would have to take you home to your parents and that when I did you would have to face the music."

Harry shrugged and then thinking better of it nodded in agreement. He hadn't really believed that he could just go to his godfather's and that Sirius could say or do something to make everything fine.

Harry was beginning to feel like the world's biggest dolt. Now not only was he in trouble but Sirius knew about it.

He felt his stomach flip as he slowly took the two steps to his godfather's side.

"Hey," Sirius said in a soothing voice as he crouched down in front of his godson once more. "Trust me, I know exactly how you are feeling right now and it feels like shit." He paused as Harry gave him a small grin for his slip of words. "But trust me, one day you will be thankful that you have a mum and a dad that care enough to get upset with you."

Harry nodded. "I know."

He had heard more than a few stories about how awful his godfather's birth parents had been. Usually he agreed with Sirius that his parents sounded dreadful but he couldn't help but wonder in this situation if he would prefer to have parents that would ignore his bad behavior rather than a dad that was about to smack his bum.

"It's true," Sirius insisted. "I didn't realize how true it was until I was far older than you are now but I promise you Harry it is true." He held his godson's gaze for a moment before he stood up. He reached down and gave the boy's shoulder a quick tight squeeze. "Ready to face the firing squad then?" He asked hoping to cause a least a little bit of amusement.

"As ready as I'll ever be," Harry replied in a sad voice as Sirius reached onto the mantel and took a handful of floo powder.

Sirius stepped into the fireplace with his godson following suit a second after.

"Oh and Bean." Sirius said in a somber voice.

"Yeah?" Harry stole a sideways glance at his godfather. For a moment he almost expected Sirius to scold him for the first time in his life. His tone certainly sounded like he was about to.

"Don't tell your mum I said shit in front of you."

Harry couldn't help the small laugh that escaped from him. He was thankful that despite how much trouble he was in, Sirius could still cheer him up. "I won't," he promised.

 **TBC...**


	5. Chapter 5

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Harry used the back of his right hand to brush a few stray tears off of his left cheek. The front of his right trainer pushed into the baseboard of the wall in front of him, instantly creating a dark scruff mark.

He sniffled as he brushed tears away once more. He was feeling absolutely horrible for himself. He had never been sent to his dad's study before. He had never been told to stand in the corner either. Somehow his decision to run away to his godfather's house had upped the ante as far as his punishment was concerned.

Despite how sorry he was feeling for himself he still couldn't help but feel thankful for how his parents had handled things. They didn't yell at him or even scold him in front of Sirius. Harry had half expected his dad to whack his bum the second he was back in his own parlor. Luckily that hadn't happened either.

His mum had nearly crushed him in a hug, her own tears causing Harry to start crying once more. Fortunately, he was able to somehow get them under control before he pulled away and gave his godfather a view of his face. While he was being squished in his mum's arms, his dad had gently ruffled his hair. The loving family moment came to an end the moment Harry and his mum stopped hugging and his dad sternly instructed him to go to the study and find a corner to put his nose in.

Harry hurried out of the room before his dad changed his mind and punished him right there with everyone watching. In his hurry though, he didn't miss his godfather's stunned expression.

He had only been in the corner for roughly four minutes but to Harry it felt like hours. He was sure that if his dad took much longer he would just die staring at the boring grey wall.

Harry remembered his dad and godfather telling him about how his grandad used to make them stand in the corner when they were in really big trouble. Sirius had even confided in Harry that he had hated doing so more than the punishment that would follow. Harry had always thought that Sirius was crazy for that statement but now that he was experiencing it himself he understood exactly what the man had meant. He didn't care if his dad walloped him for the next week as long as it meant that he could stop standing in the boring corner.

He sniffled loudly as the door to the study opened.

Harry turned his head slightly to the side in an attempt to see if it was just his dad that had walked in.

"Head forward," his dad's stern voice instructed.

Harry's head quickly snapped forward causing James to fill with guilt. He had never resorted to sending his son to the corner before. In his own childhood, he loathed spending time in the corner, his eyes boring into the boring paint. James had always told himself that he wouldn't make Harry suffer through the same punishment.

That was before the boy scared him out of his mind with his disappearing act.

Now James was feeling quite adamant that a few more minutes in the corner wouldn't permanently scar the child. He actually found himself hoping that Harry hated it as much as he did so that with some luck it would serve as a deterrent for the boy.

"Daddy," Harry tried, his voice thick with tears.

"While I am sure that you have plenty that you wish to say, I am also certain that it can wait until you have completed your time in the corner," James replied in a stern voice. He picked up his desk chair and moved it across the room so that it was now facing his son.

Slowly James sat down. He was hit with a sudden wave of feeling far older than he was. Unanticipatedly he felt more like his father than he ever had in the past.

For a moment, he debated leaving the study and retreating to his own room to collect a slipper. He quickly decided against it though. Harry had made a colossal mistake, that could not be denied, but James still felt the slipper was far too harsh for a child so young.

He glanced up at the clock on the mantel and decided that another two minutes would suffice.

A loud sniffle came from his son causing James' heart to break a bit in the process.

"But daddy I -"

"I am trying to be patient Harry James and as I have already said in a moment you can tell me whatever it is that you want as you and I will be doing plenty of talking," James said in an even tone. "Until then however I expect you to remain silent and think about what you did that landed you in this position in the first place."

Harry bit down on his bottom lip as he thought about how exactly he could answer that question in a way that would result in his being in less trouble. Unfortunately, the only reasoning that he was coming up with was the truth which didn't seem like much.

Harry's trainer pushed into the floorboard once more causing another small scuff mark.

James cleared his throat loudly in response causing his son's foot to move back, stopping next to his side.

James glanced up at the clock once more. "Come here please Harry."

Slowly Harry turned on his heel. He was sure that he had never seen his dad quite as angry as the man looked now.

James crooked his finger causing Harry to sigh softly before a small sob escaped his mouth.

A moment later he was standing in front of his dad, his small body between the man's knees.

"I'm sorry that I listened to your conversation," Harry offered hopeful that his apology would somehow help his situation.

"Thank you. We will address your eavesdropping in a moment. First however, I would like to discuss what exactly you were thinking when you decided to use the floo without permission and run off to your godfather's."

Harry shrugged quietly.

"No Sir," James shook his head. "A shrug isn't going to cut it this time Harry. You have been told multiple times how dangerous things are right now. Have you any idea how worried your mother and I were when we realized that you were gone?"

His tears had never stopped but they had slowed down. The words from his dad however caused them to make a reappearance at full force.

"Why on earth would you do such a thing?"

Harry took note that his dad's voice wasn't angry, it was sad. As if Harry's actions had hurt him in the worst way possible.

"I was mad," Harry answered honestly. "I was mad at you and mum for saying that I couldn't go to the Burrow so I left. I thought maybe I could get Sirius to take me to Ron's."

"So you intended to lie to your godfather?" James asked with an eyebrow raised in shock. He couldn't imagine such an event occurring. Harry would never lie to Sirius simply because if he was caught and Sirius was cross with him, Harry would be mortified. James knew this as well as he knew his own middle name.

Harry nodded. "Yeah," he admitted softly. "But I didn't. I told him the truth."

James cleared his throat softly before speaking in a gentle voice. "I know that the war is making things difficult for you. I know that it must be boring to be stuck in the house all of the time. I know that you miss your friends. I am sure that you cannot begin to comprehend how dangerous our world actually is at the moment. However, Harry, none of that excuses what you did today. You know that you are not allowed to use the floo alone. You also know that when your mum and I say something our decision stands. We are in charge of making the decisions and whether you agree with them or not you must obey the rules we set out."

"I know," Harry nodded as the tears ran down his face. "I was just so mad."

"You are allowed to be mad. But there are about a dozen other ways that you could have handled the situation better," James replied softly as his right hand gently brushed the tears from Harry's face. "Can you tell me one?"

"I could have talked to you and mum," Harry answered without hesitation. "Instead of leaving." He had known all along that his leaving was about the dumbest thing to do, he had just been too angry to care.

"Very good," James nodded. "And if you had done so you wouldn't have found yourself in trouble."

"Yes huh. I was already in trouble for listening," Harry replied sadly.

James forced himself to swallow a chuckle as a look of regret swept over his son's face. "Don't worry Harry, you didn't out yourself. I hadn't forgotten about it." A look of remorse swept over his son's tear stained face before he continued. "We have had this discussion on multiple occasions. I will not bore you by giving you the same lecture that you have heard a dozen times before. I will say this though, the warnings are done. If you are caught eavesdropping it will result in a trip over my knee are we clear?"

Harry nodded as he felt his cheeks heat up profusely. He quickly promised himself that he would break the habit once and for all. Anything to keep him from feeling the way he did at this moment.

"Now then have you anything else to say for yourself?" James asked his voice now much sterner than it had been a moment ago.

Harry shook his head silently as the tears that he had gotten under control only moments ago began to fall again. Unfortunately, he had been in this same position in the past. Each time he promised himself that it wouldn't happen again. He absolutely hated that look of disappointment in his dad's eyes. He wasn't too fond of what was to come next either.

Gently James reached out and removed his son's glasses placing them on the desk behind him before repositioning his child so that he was now at his side.

In one quick movement he popped open the button on Harry's jeans before removing the clothing that was in his way. Although Harry did not help him with this task the child didn't fight it either which James was grateful for.

In his own childhood he often argued with his dad over the loss of his trousers for a punishment. Several times he had taken a step backwards making it impossible for the man to reach him. Looking back on it now he wasn't sure how his father didn't completely lose his patience with him. He also wasn't sure how the man managed to dole out a punishment with the way James had carried on sometimes. Harry may have already started crying but at least he wasn't begging not to be punished.

James wasted no time in helping his son over his knee and quickly positioned him to his liking. He usually gave his son his age plus two. Ten smacks was the most that Harry had ever received. Still, he couldn't help but feel that his running off required a bit more.

"Fifteen," James said hoping that his voice wasn't shaky.

"Daddy no," Harry couldn't help the small whine of a protest that escaped him,.

"Oh yes," James nodded suddenly feeling more confident in his decision. "You put yourself in a very dangerous situation today and if this is what it will take to prevent you from doing so in the future then so be it."

As the last word left his mouth he raised his hand and brought it down smartly on the small backside that was presenting itself.

Once, when James and Sirius had snuck out in the middle of the night and been caught, his father had told him that spanking him hurt him far more than it hurt James. At the time James had found the statement to be ridiculous. How his dad could hurt more than his bum did made absolutely no sense to him but as Harry sobbed loudly at the second smack James understood completely.

James knew that he was being harder on his child than he normally was but he refused to allow Harry to jeopardize his own safety.

As his hand fell for the fifth time, Harry squirmed over his knee.

Seeing no point in prolonging his punishment any longer, James started spanking in earnest.

After his hand fell for the fifteenth time James gently began rubbing his crying child's back. A moment later Harry rushed to his feet, quickly pulling his jeans back up to their rightful place, wincing as they traveled over his freshly punished backside.

"I'm sorry," he choked out through his tears as he fell forward into his father's arms.

James wrapped his arms tightly around his son as he hushed him softly. "I know you are," he whispered into Harry's left ear. "You are forgiven."

Harry let out another heart wrenching sob as he tried to get his emotions under control, tried to get his tears to stop completely.

James gave the boy a gentle squeeze. "No more okay?" He asked in a gentle voice.

Harry nodded enthusiastically. He wasn't sure if his father was referring to his listening to private conversations or his using the floo alone to go to Sirius' but either way Harry agreed with the man. He promised himself right then and there that he would never find himself on the receiving end of a spanking again. "Never," Harry promised.

James suppressed a small chuckle and forced his voice to remain neutral as he answered his son. "I hope that rings true." He rubbed Harry's back once more before gently pulling Harry from the tight grip that the boy had around his neck.

He looked down at his son. The boy's eyes were swollen, red, and tired. His cheeks were flushed. "I believe that I hear your bed calling your name."

It was part of the ritual in their house. If Harry was spanked then he was sent for a nap following. Harry was sure that most kids his age would hate it. After all, he was far too old for something as babyish as a nap. Harry did not mind it though. Crying always made him tired and he liked the time with both of his parents that the nap brought.

"Okay," Harry agreed in a soft voice. "Will you carry me up?" He knew that he was too old to be carried and he would be mortified if any of his friends found out that he was but he was small for his age and he liked it. Aside from that it was part of the ritual as well. His dad always carried him up for his nap.

James smiled softly as he stood and then leaned down and picked up his son, careful to position his bottom so that it wasn't in more pain.

"Sirius went home?" Harry asked with a yawn as his dad carried him out of the study.

Harry's voice had sounded nonchalant but James knew better. Harry idolized his godfather. James was sure that Harry thought that being carried was way too childish for Sirius to witness.

"Right after you went into the study," James assured him. "Though you shouldn't be embarrassed. That godfather of yours was in your situation plenty of times when he was young."

Harry shrugged. He had heard all the stories about his dad and godfather and all the trouble that they had gotten into. He didn't think that they were lies but they didn't make him feel any better about his current predicament either. His godfather got in trouble years and years ago. Now he was the coolest adult ever and Harry couldn't let the man see him being carried to bed post spanking.

James walked up the staircase as Harry wiped the last of his tears from his face. "Daddy?"

"Hmm?" James asked.

"I really am sorry about everything."

"It's okay," James responded softly. "You learned a lesson, yes?"

Harry nodded as his dad walked into his room and gently deposited his son onto his bed. "Yeah."

"Which was?" James prompted as he pulled Harry's quilt over the boy's legs.

"Listening to other people's conversations is rude," Harry replied through a yawn. "And I can't do things that are dangerous just because I am angry."

James grinned softly as Harry laid down. He leaned over and placed a single kiss on his son's forehead. "That's what I was hoping that you had learned." James paused as his right hand gently ruffled his son's hair. "Now sleep," he said as he stood up and waved a hand causing Harry's room to darken a considerable amount. "We will wake you in an hour for lunch."

* * *

"The corner? Honestly Jamie doesn't that constitute as cruel and unusual punishment?"

James rolled his eyes in response. "Sirius really."

"Don't dismiss this," Sirius replied in the most solemn voice he could manage. "We loathed spending time in the corner and here you are making that sweet, innocent child do the same."

"That sweet innocent child that you are referring to scared the wits out of me," James retorted as his eyes settled in on Harry's glasses that were still sitting on his desk. He made a mental note of their location as he knew that Harry would be looking for them later.

"He scared me as well. My first thought was that something had happened to you and Lily."

"While I am sure that that situation was scary I wouldn't compare that to not being able to find your child where he is supposed to be."

Sirius nodded in agreement. "You are right. You are absolutely right. Still Jamie, _the corner_?"

James laughed as he shook his head. "I didn't beat him Sirius. I didn't even make him stand there as long as we had to and if it worked to keep him out of trouble in the future then I will use it again."

"Well if he grows up to be mean we certainly know who will be at blame," Sirius replied with a sly grin.

James' laughter grew louder at his best friend's remark. "I'm not worried Sirius."

* * *

"Well hello there," Lily said softly as Harry's eyes slowly opened. "How are we feeling?"

"Better," Harry replied in a sleepy voice. "And stupid."

Lily frowned at her child. "Not in the least Love."

"I'm sorry mum," Harry said in a soft voice. "I didn't mean to make you worry when I left."

"It's okay," she replied. "However, if you ever make me worry like that again I will have a go at you after your father is done." She gave him a pointed look as her son blushed at her words. "Here," she pulled a chocolate frog from behind her back and handed it to her son. "Spoil your lunch a bit."

Harry grinned widely as he accepted her treat. Whenever he got into trouble, even if it was her that did the punishing she always spoiled him a bit afterwards. Harry wasn't quite sure why but then he never questioned it either. He loved his mum for many reasons but her ability to always make him feel better was high on the list.

"Hurry and eat that, I made your favorite for lunch and your dad and Sirius are waiting on us."

"Sirius is here?" Harry asked in an excited voice.

"He is," Lily nodded. "And if I hear correctly then I am pretty sure that he and your dad want to play some Quidditch with you after we eat."

Harry smiled as he bit into his chocolate frog before jumping out of his bed. He was sure that he was going to have the best day that he had had in a while.

 **TBC...**


	6. Chapter 6

**Enjoy! The next chapter will be up soon :)**

* * *

The water splashed over the side of the tub as Harry made his two small ships crash into one another.

"If you are playing in there then I hope that means that you have finished washing yourself," Lily called from the hallway.

She knew some parents that would absolutely lose their mind if their child made a mess of the bathroom floor but Lily didn't mind some splashed water. As long as her child was clean and happy a wet floor could be easily dried.

"Yes mum," Harry called back before quickly dunking his head underwater in an attempt to get the last of the suds out of his hair.

Lily cracked the door open, a small frown taking over her gentle features as she eyed her son, his head still full of shampoo.

"It's almost all out," Harry offered in a meek voice.

Her frown slowly turned into a half amused smile. "Get it all out please and be sure to wash behind your ears. Scrub your fingers as well. The dirt was practically caked onto your knuckles from earlier."

Harry frowned as he looked down at his hands. There was still a bit of dirt stuck on.

"Exactly as I expected," Lily mused. "Get yourself completely clean or I will be forced to do it for you."

Harry made a horrified face. It had been nearly a year since he needed assistance with bathing.

"Don't give me that face," Lily tried not to chuckle. "Do as you are told."

Harry picked up his wash cloth and quickly lathered it up with soap, setting to work on his fingers.

Lily smiled softly before closing the bathroom door.

She silently gave thanks for such a well behaved child. She knew that Harry had his moments but overall, he was quite well behaved as far as eight year olds went and she was grateful for it. Her child's disposition was especially helpful on nights like the one that they were having.

James was off on a mission, attempting to wipe out an entire camp of Death Eaters. As a direct result, Lily's nerves were shot. She was absolutely sure that she had never been quite so worried in all of her life. She had completely given up on her heart beat regaining normality until James and Sirius were home safe. She was also sure that if her child gave her a hard time tonight that she would not be able to handle it. The very little patience that she was able to muster would vanish completely.

She picked up one of Harry's shirts from the pile of clean clothes and folded it. She was tempted to wave an arm and have the pile of clothes fold themselves. However, she always told Harry the importance of knowing how to do things without magic and doing so often. It was her belief that relying on magic all of the time made one lazy. Aside from that, the muggle busy work was helping her nerves.

"Mum," Harry called from the bathroom. "Can you come here?"

"Coming Love," she called before placing the shirt on the top of the folded pile.

Lily walked down the hall and cracked the door open once more before peering into the bathroom. She raised a questioning eyebrow at her child.

"Is this better?" Harry asked as he held his hands up for inspecting.

"Much," she replied with a small grin. "Now work on getting the rest of the soap out of your hair please."

Harry smiled before ducking his head under the water to rid his head of the last of the suds.

"What time will daddy be home?" he asked a moment later when he resurfaced.

"Not until long after you are asleep I'm afraid," Lily replied as she leaned against the doorframe.

"Can I wait up for him?"

Lily shook her head. "Not tonight Love. It will be much too late by the time that they are back."

"You always say that," Harry pointed out. His tone was normal and calm but Lily could hear the slight hint of frustration behind it.

"Because it is always the truth," Lily reasoned gently. "You are too young to be up all hours of the night. You would be miserable tomorrow if I allowed it."

"You could allow it just this once and I could prove to you that I won't be miserable tomorrow," Harry couldn't help but try as he picked up a cup from the side of the tub. He filled it with water and quickly dumped it over his head washing the rest of the suds away.

"Is that so?" Lily mused softly.

Harry nodded hopefully as he stood up and quickly grabbed his towel and wrapped it around himself before stepping out of the tub. "Just this once," Harry clarified once more.

Lily smiled softly at her son. She was sure that even if she allowed Harry to stay up he would fall asleep long before James and Sirius arrived.

"Just this once," Lily agreed.

"Really?" Harry nearly shrieked. He was sure that he had heard her wrong. His mum bent the rules on occasion but never when it came to his bedtime. It was the one subject that she never relented on.

Lily nodded. "Really. However, you will put your clean clothes away for me."

"Deal," Harry replied with a grin as he stood in the middle of the bathroom rug wrapped in a large fuzzy towel.

"Dry yourself completely," Lily instructed. "And then you can come downstairs for a treat."

* * *

"These are really good," Harry mused as he licked the chocolate frosting off a small biscuit.

"How many of those have you had?" Lily asked as she looked up from the tea she was brewing.

"Only four," Harry replied as he reached for another biscuit.

"That is your last one," Lily decided as she pulled two teacups from the cabinet above her head.

Harry nodded in agreement as he watched his mum pour them each a cup of tea.

She crossed the room with a cup in each hand. A moment later she placed Harry's cup in front of him and then slid into her seat. Her hands cradled her own cup as she smiled softly at her son. She watched as he licked frosting off his right thumb. His innocence was enough to make her want to burst into tears. While it was an absolute blessing that he had no idea how bad things truly were, she couldn't help but wonder how long they could keep things that way.

She silently prayed that Harry would never discover how scary the world truly was.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Of course you can," Lily replied as she hoped that she had only imagined her voice cracking as though she were about to cry.

"Promise you won't get mad?" Harry asked before popping the last bite of the biscuit in his mouth.

"You have my word." Lily sipped her tea. She was a bit apprehensive about what her child was going to ask.

"I know that last time things got messed up and I couldn't but do you think I could visit Ron soon? I really miss him."

"I know that you do," Lily replied with a sad smile. "I wish that you could visit him right now." She paused for a moment as she carefully selected her words. "I promise you that as soon as things calm down you will see Ron."

Harry's face dropped as he nodded. Her shoulders now slumped over his tea.

"Hey now, don't look so down," Lily tried. "After all, your bedtime was over an hour ago and here you are eating chocolate biscuits and drinking tea with me."

"I _was_ eating chocolate biscuits," Harry couldn't help but point out. "You said that I couldn't have anymore."

Lily rolled her eyes playfully. "One more and then I promise you that if I see another biscuit go into your mouth I will use a spell to turn you into a chocolate biscuit."

"Is there such a spell?" Harry asked as he reached out and selected one more treat.

"If there isn't I will invent one," Lily replied fighting to keep the smirk off her face. Once again thankful for the innocence of her child. She had been so afraid that his question would pertain to the war or where his father and godfather were. And although she hated how upset Harry seemed when he talked about his best friend, she was still glad that his question wasn't too serious or hard to answer.

Lily sat up a bit straighter as she heard the floo roar to life in the parlor. Her heart beat a bit faster. "James?" She called out.

Harry jumped up from his seat, his tea long forgotten.

"Lily," James hollered.

She instantly heard the fear in his voice. The urgency in his tone.

"Dad," Harry happily shrieked oblivious to what his mother was hearing.

A moment later James appeared in the kitchen, a look of sheer terror on his face.

"Why are you awake?" James asked. "Why is he awake?" His attention now on Lily.

"What is it?" She asked ignoring his questions altogether. She had never seen her husband so close to tears. "Where is Sirius?"

"He is fine," James replied as he picked up Harry.

Despite the fact that he was far too old to be carried, Harry did not fight his father's action. He was beginning to sense that something was very wrong.

James passed Harry to Lily and once she was holding her son, he took a grip of her arm. "We have to run Lil," he said in a serious voice. "We have to go right now. He knows."

Lily felt the blood drain from her face. Her hands began to feel clammy. Her stomach flipped over itself.

"Run?" Harry questioned in a scared voice. "Run where? Who knows what?" He wished that he were braver. He wished that his hands weren't currently gripping onto his mum's shirt like a four year old.

"Stay with your mum," James instructed placing a kiss on Harry's forehead before leaning in and kissing Lily gently on the lips.

"We aren't going anywhere without you," Lily replied the tears now running quietly down her face.

James paused for a moment before nodding his agreement. "Give me a moment to floo call my parents."

The words were barely out of his mouth before he exited the room.

"Mummy why are we running? Why are you crying?" Harry asked in a terrified voice. He could feel his insides filling with a sense of dread. He had never seen his mum cry. He had never seen his dad look so afraid. He could feel the tears burning his eyes and he wasn't even sure why he was going to cry.

Lily opened up her mouth to try and give her child an answer to his questions when she heard her husband let out an ear-piercing scream.

"Lily run!" James screamed in a pained voice. "He's here! Take Harry and run!"

Harry's grip on his mum tightened as she ran towards the back door.

"We can't leave daddy," Harry cried the tears now streaming down his face as well. "Wait for him mummy, please wait for him."

"You are so loved," Lily answered through her tears. She was sure that she could never bring herself to explain to her child why they couldn't wait for James. "I love you so much. Daddy loves you so much."

Lily forced open the back door as she felt Harry's fingers dig deeper into her sides.

"I need you to always know that," Lily continued. "Always, always remember that."

Harry could feel the tears dripping from his chin as he hugged his mother tighter. "Daddy," he yelled over her shoulder. His voice was hoarse from his tears. The words burning his throat as they exited his body.

Harry's eyes widened. His grip on his mother tightened even more so, his hands gripping her shirt so tightly that he was sure if he pulled hard enough he could rip the material in half. A dark figure had appeared in the kitchen doorway.

"Mummy," Harry whimpered hoping that his small cry would be enough to make her turn around and see that someone was behind them.

Lily pushed open the screen door with her body, her arms still wrapped around her son. James was gone, she was sure of it. She wanted nothing more than to collapse onto the floor in a heap of tears. She couldn't imagine a life without him. She couldn't imagine telling Harry. The thought of her son was the only thing keeping her going. She couldn't let anything happen to him. She would do whatever it took to keep him safe, she vowed that to herself.

The dark figure moved slowly across the room, his wand raised.

"Mummy," Harry said in a louder voice, this time tugging at her in an attempt to make her turn around.

"We can't go back Love," Lily sobbed, choking on the words. "We can't."

"No look," Harry cried. He was sure that he had never been so afraid in his life.

Lily was about to step outside when she turned around. She let out a gut wrenching sob as her every fear was confirmed. Despite the fact that she had never seen him before she did not have a single doubt in her mind that she was looking into the eyes of Voldemort.

"Step aside," he hissed. "You know what I have come for. Do not be foolish."

The sound of his voice made her head throb. She took a firmer grip on Harry who was sobbing in her arms. Her wand was in her back pocket but she could not get to it unless she put her son down, an act that she was not willing to do.

"Step aside," he repeated the words in a deadly low voice. "You can live."

In a split-second decision Lily pulled Harry off her body and placed her child behind her. She didn't miss Harry's whimper as she literally forced her shirt out of his tightly closed fists. The moment his feet touched the ground she pushed his small body behind hers. His hands instantly grabbed ahold of the back of her shirt, holding on to her for dear life. "Not Harry," she forced out through her sobs. "Please not Harry! Have mercy please!"

"Fool," he laughed. "Stupid woman."

"Shut up!" Harry yelled suddenly feeling a small surge of courage. He didn't know who this evil man was but he wasn't going to let anyone talk to his mum that way.

Voldemort laughed loudly at Harry's words before slowly raising his wand. "I see the little brat wants to protect his mummy," he said through his laughter. "Pity he doesn't realize how many have died trying to protect others, his father being the last victim."

"My dad isn't dead," Harry replied in a nearly defiant voice.

Lily couldn't help but wish that Harry's mere refusal to believe it was so could change the fact that it was.

"Enough of this!" Voldemort declared suddenly annoyed by the fact that his conquest was still breathing. "Move out of the way so that I may complete my task."

"Never," Lily dared to answer through her tears. "I will never let you have my son!" Her right hand quickly traveled to her back pocket and retrieved her wand. She raised it at Voldemort prepared to fight for their lives.

Voldemort let out a hearty laugh as he pointed his own wand directly at her chest. "Avada Kedavra," he said in a bored tone.

Lily screamed loudly, the sound of it piercing Harry's eardrums. A bright green light nearly blinded him as he felt himself fall backwards, a strong pressure forcing him down.

"Avada Kedavra."

Harry heard the words once more as another blinding green light filled his world. His forehead throbbed as if his head were going to explode. He stayed on the cold kitchen floor, his body curled into the fetal position as he cried in pain.

Harry's tears turned to loud sobs as he heard an evil, angry laugh. He hugged his knees to his chest, his whole body shaking with fear.

He wanted to get up - to help his mum, to go find his dad - to do anything useful but he couldn't make himself move. He was too scared to do anything but cry.

The room was silent now and somehow Harry knew that the evil man had left.

He was alone - in every sense of the word.

 **TBC...**


	7. Chapter 7

**Enjoy! I know that this chapter is on the shorter side but I promise that the next few will more than make up for it. Also just a reminder that this story is AU so if I could not receive messages and reviews telling me that I wrote it wrong that would be great, thanks.**

* * *

His whole body ached. His throat was on fire. His head was pounding with pain that was more than he had ever felt before. His eyes felt like they were full of sand.

He wasn't sure how or when he had moved but he was no longer on the kitchen floor. He was huddled into the small crawl space behind the stairs to the second floor.

His parents were dead.

He remembered shaking his mum as hard as he could before sobbing and screaming in his dad's face.

His parents were dead.

A strong wave of tears rushed to the surface as the realization of it all washed over Harry once more.

He would never smell his dad's pancakes again or play Quidditch with him until the sun went down. They would never have another tickle fight or play another game of Exploding Snap. He would never hear his mum sing while she did the dishes again. He would never get to go with her to the market on Saturday mornings again or dance around the house with her to the Muggle music that she liked. The three of them would never vacation to the seaside again.

His parents were dead.

The tears streaked down his face causing him to cough, choking on his own sorrow.

He sucked in his breath, a feeling of paralyzing fear filling his body as he heard the screen door in the kitchen slam shut. Harry hugged his knees rightly to his chest in an attempt to make himself as small as possible. He swallowed hard as he tried to control his tears. He was absolutely sure that the horrible monster man was back. He closed his eyes tightly in an attempt to alleviate the excruciating pain that was still pounding in his head.

The sounds of someone else crying - sobbing - caused Harry's fear to subside slightly. Surely the man who had killed them would not come back to cry. He slowly pulled himself to his knees. Careful to be as quiet as he possibly could he peered through the small crack in the wooden door. A man dressed in all black with long black hair was cradling his mum in his arms. Harry gasped softly at the site of it. He had never seen the man before. The sound of his despondent weeping nearly made Harry want to emerge from his safe space. However, he did not know who this man was and despite the fact that he looked heartbroken, Harry did not trust that it was not an act.

Harry slowly sat back down on his bum. Once again he hugged his knees to his chest. His tears continued as he heard the sobs on the other side of the door.

* * *

"Harry," the voice rang out causing Harry to literally jump at the sound of it.

He wasn't sure how he had managed to fall asleep but somehow he had. His neck was sore and cramped from resting his head on his knees. His back ached. His forehead felt like it had been lit on fire.

Harry was nearly positive that he knew whose voice had called out for him but he stayed completely still as he listened for it once more.

"Harry!"

Harry jumped to his knees and quickly scurried over to look out through the small crack. The mysterious dark haired man was gone as was his mum's body.

"Harry if you are here please make yourself known!" The voice was pleading now and for the first time Harry heard the emotions behind it.

Harry scrambled to his feet before pushing open the small wooden door and practically falling into the parlor. "Remus," he called back in a hoarse voice. He wasn't sure when his tears had started again but once more they were streaming down his face. "Remus!"

Harry heard more than one pair of feet clatter down the staircase.

A moment later Remus' face came into view.

Harry nearly tripped over his own two feet as he ran towards the man and flung himself into his arms, sobbing loudly into his chest. It did not matter to him that the Headmaster of Hogwarts was standing there watching. Harry was sure that he had never been so happy to see Remus in all of his life.

"My mum," Harry forced the words out through his tears. He peered over Remus' shoulder to the fireplace where his dad had been lying in front of it. "Daddy- they were here."

"They're gone Harry," Remus said gently as he hugged the boy tightly. "They're gone."

Harry nodded his understanding. "But they were here."

"They have been removed," the Headmaster spoke in a gentle voice.

Harry wanted to ask where they were. He wanted to scream at the man for taking his parents away. He wanted to beg Remus to bring them back somehow. But all he could do was cry and hold onto Remus for dear life.

"His head," the Headmaster said as he reached out a hand and gently touched Harry's forehead.

"Not now," Remus shook his head as he squeezed Harry a bit tighter. He couldn't begin to imagine what Harry had gone through. The child had likely seen his parents be murdered. He could have seen them tortured. Remus had instantly noticed the angry lightning shaped scar on Harry's forehead but he was sure that this exact moment was not the right time to examine it. "There, there," Remus tried to gently comfort the child. "Deep breaths Harry."

* * *

"How did he manage to survive?"

"I cannot be certain yet but I would be willing to bet that his parents love for him had something to do with it. They likely sacrificed themselves to protect him," Albus answered in a soft voice. The twinkle that usually occupied his eye had vanished hours ago.

After bringing Harry to his own house, Remus had stayed next to the child for hours. When he was sure that Harry's tears had finally stopped, Remus had given the child a hefty dose of Dreamless Sleep and then laid next to him for the first hour after his eyes drifted shut. Even then it had broken Remus to leave the child's side. He was holding on to a ridiculous notion that somehow if he stayed with Harry every horrible event of the night would vanish.

"A time turner," Remus suddenly said with a bit more enthusiasm than he had expected.

Albus smiled sadly at the man sitting across from him. "You know as well as I do that it would not work. Going back in time to save one life would be complicated enough...but five lives? Aside from that, knowing that Sirius would have done this would be an endless torture. One could not be expected to act as though they were not aware of what he was capable of." He paused for a moment before continuing gently, "You have lost nearly all the family that you know."

"And Harry cannot stay with me?" Remus asked sadly. The situation had been explained to him twice now and yet he still couldn't grasp it.

"In order to stay protected Harry must be with a blood relative. Sadly Sirius would have sufficed. He and James pricked their fingers and become blood brothers at the age of thirteen. Given the circumstances, with both his parents and grandparents now gone, the only blood family he has left is his Aunt, Lily's sister."

"How much time do I have with him? May I keep him until the end of the week at least?" Remus was desperate for Albus to agree. Harry was not even aware that his grandparents had been murdered as well. Remus was sure that the news would be devastating at best and he hated the idea of shipping the child off when he was in such a fragile state.

"Ideally I would like to deliver him to his relatives in the morning."

"He has lost his family - his parents, grandparents, and godfather in one horrible night," Remus replied softly. "With all due respect, I don't think it is fair to the child to send him off so quickly. He only sees his Aunt and Uncle but once or twice a year."

Albus was silent for a moment before nodding softly. "He may stay with you until the end of the week."

A soft sigh of relief escaped Remus' lips, "Thank you." He knew that in the large picture Harry's aunt and uncle raising him was likely for the best. With his condition, he knew that keeping Harry could be detrimental to him. A child should not - could not - be raised in the environment that Remus created. The idea of it was barmy at best.

"It's quite late. I should go," Albus said pulling Remus from his thoughts. "I would like to stop back in the morning and take a closer look at Harry's scar."

Remus nodded his agreement. "I would like to keep him out of St. Mungo's if at all possible."

"My thoughts exactly," Albus agreed. "The last thing that the child needs is to be poked and prodded at. Regardless St. Mungo's will not know how to handle the situation. Another living soul has not managed to face Voldemort and survive. I am certain that his scar is the mark of an Unforgivable Curse - likely the Killing Curse."

Remus grimaced at the thought.

"Some Dreamless Sleep may do you a world of good as well," Albus mused gently as he stood and made his way towards the front door.

"I will be fine," Remus insisted despite the fact that he felt anything but fine.

"If you do not take care of yourself you cannot hope to care for Harry," Albus replied as he opened the front door, seeing himself out.

Remus watched the Headmaster go. He waited until front door shut completely before his face crumbled, the tears that he had been holding back for hours rushing to the surface as though they were just waiting for permission to fall.

Slowly he brought his knees to his chest, curling into himself in the armchair. He heart ached for Harry - for himself. Trying to wrap his mind around the fact that they were all gone was wretched. The thought that Sirius was the cause of it all was unbearable. Remus had not allowed himself to believe it yet. Despite the fact that Sirius had already been carted off to Azkaban he was still holding on to some hope that it was all a big misunderstanding. He couldn't imagine Sirius betraying anyone he loved let alone the Potters. The Sirius Black that he knew would rather die before doing such a thing.

Remus couldn't help but wonder if the man had been placed under the Imperius Curse though he knew that even if he had it likely wouldn't save him.

Remus' tears continued to fall as he concentrated on keeping his emotions as quiet as he could. He was sure that the potion that Harry took would see to it that the child stayed asleep but Remus still couldn't help but worry that Harry would wake and find him in the condition that he was.

He had to protect Harry. Above everything else, he had to protect him the best that he could. And if that meant that Remus had to keep his emotions under control when Harry was present then so be it.

* * *

"He is dead then?"

Albus nodded once. "His body was removed from the Potter's garden, he seemed to have blasted clear through their kitchen roof."

Minerva closed her eyes tightly at the thought. She couldn't begin to imagine what that poor little boy had seen. "And Harry?"

"Is currently with Remus. I granted permission for him to stay with him for the remainder of the week, however at that point he will be moved to his Aunt and Uncle's house in Surrey."

Minerva pursed her lips before slowly opening her mouth to respond. "Albus forgive me but when I learned of those plans earlier this evening I paid a trip to Surrey and observed Harry's relatives." She paused as she tried to think of a kind way to say what needed to be said and then quickly abandoned that plan altogether and decided to speak the truth. "They are the worst kind of muggles. They don't seem to care for anything but themselves and that son of theirs is an outright spoiled brat."

"He must be with blood family," Albus replied. "It is the only way to guarantee his safety."

"Rubbish," she replied before she could stop herself. "There must be another way! There must be a spell or something that isn't being thought of."

Albus shook his head sadly. "There is not. The only way to ensure that he is fully protected is to place him with blood family. If I am correct in my theory of how Harry managed to survive, which I am nearly certain that I am, he needs a family member's blood to continue to stay protected."

"Voldemort is dead," Minerva responded. "You've said that yourself. You removed the body."

"Indeed I did. I removed the body but not the soul. I believe that one day he could return and when he does Harry will be in grave danger."

"You are talking about their boy," Minerva said in a piercing voice. "James and Lily's boy." She paused for a moment willing her emotions to remain at bay. Regardless of what she felt she refused to be transformed into some hysterical woman who was speaking merely on despair. "Charles and Lydia's boy." She swallowed hard before continuing. "Remus, Peter, and Sirius' boy."

"Sirius is the reason that we are having this discussion in the first place," Albus replied in a detrimental tone.

Silence reigned for several long moments before Minerva gently cleared her throat.

"He was mine for seven years Albus. Sirius Black is a lot of things. He is cheeky. He is mischievous to the point that describing him as outright naughty would not be a stretch. I would even go as far to say that he can be a complete pain in the arse. There were easily a dozen moments in his academic career where I would have liked to have given him a hiding and I likely would have had I not been privy to how Mr. Potter handled him. That being said he is not a murderer."

"Now Minerva it is a fact that-"

She held up a hand effectively causing Albus to trail off.

"I know that all signs are pointing to him. I know that he is already locked away in Azkaban and that there is very little, if anything, that can be done about it. However, you will not, nor will anyone else, ever convince me that he is guilty of these crimes. Sirius Black loved the Potters. He loved them as though they were his own blood family. He would have killed himself before allowing one of them to die. And that Albus Dumbledore is a fact."

 **TBC...**


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's Note: I am SO incredibly sorry that it has taken me so long to update this. Hurricane Irma delayed me as I had to evacuate and a few days after I was home my husband and I left to travel. Things are settled down now though so expect updates much more often. Thank you for all of your reviews and emails :) Enjoy this chapter!**

* * *

"I thought that this news would please you."

Harry shrugged softly in reply. He hated the idea of making Remus feel bad but he wasn't jumping at the thought of going to the Burrow either. Four days ago he would have been ecstatic but that was before.

Remus' brow furrowed. He knew that the child was hurting. For the past four days he had spent most of his time crying or trying not to cry. Remus didn't expect the child to recover quickly. He himself had been crying himself to sleep every night. However, everyone agreed that Harry needed to get out of the house. He needed some sort of normalcy. Something that might even make him smile a time or two.

A trip to the Burrow was Albus' idea and Molly had agreed instantly. Remus was a bit reluctant to let the child go but did agree that seeing Ron and the other Weasley children would likely cheer him up at least a little bit.

"I will be there as well," Remus said in a gentle voice. "I plan on visiting with Molly and Arthur while you are with Ron and the others. I won't just leave you there."

"I know," Harry said into his biscuits and gravy.

Remus lowered his head a bit fighting to look Harry in the eye. The child didn't budge. His eyes bore into his breakfast, his head rested on his right hand, his shoulders slumped.

Remus sat up straight once more as he cleared his throat. "I know," he started in a voice much too soft. He cleared his throat once more before starting over. "I know that you have been through a great deal. I will not pretend to act as if I know everything that you are feeling." Remus paused for a moment swallowing hard in an attempt to keep his emotions under control. He had yet to cry in front of Harry and he wasn't about to do so now. He was sure that the child needed someone strong, not an emotional wreck. "I also do not by any means feel as though you should hide your feelings or anything of the sort. That being said, I do think that spending some time with your friends would make you feel just a little better."

Harry shrugged softly. "I don't want to."

"You don't want to see your friends or you don't want to feel better?" Remus questioned gently.

"Feel better," Harry mumbled after a moment of silence. He pushed his breakfast around with his fork.

Remus frowned deeply at the words. "Your parents would want you to be happy," Remus replied. "I know that to be a fact."

Harry shrugged once more. He loved Remus - he did, but it wasn't the same as talking to his dad or Sirius. He couldn't explain himself the way that he could with them. He couldn't find the words to tell Remus how guilty he felt or how scared he was. "Have you talked to Sirius yet?"

Remus silently shook his head. It was a question that had been asked several times a day, every day. Remus hadn't found the words to explain to Harry exactly where his godfather was and why. Instead, he had told the child that he hadn't talked to Sirius. Not exactly a lie. He kept promising himself that the next time that Harry asked he would explain it all to him but each time he found himself too cowardly to do so.

Harry poked at his food once more before setting his fork down on his plate. "Can I be excused?"

"Would you rather something else? I could make anything you like. Beans on toast perhaps?"

Remus couldn't help but feel disappointed in how things were panning out with Harry. Although he loved the boy dearly and despite the fact that he knew Harry loved him as well, he had never had quite as close of a relationship with the boy as Sirius had. They had always gotten on just fine but Remus couldn't help but feel that Harry was not confiding in him the way that he would his godfather.

Harry shook his head. "I'm not real hungry." He felt absolutely horrible for giving Remus such a hard time. He could practically hear his mum lightly scolding him to stop being impossible and eat a few more bites. He knew that Remus was just worried about him but that realization didn't change the fact that Harry was sure that he could not eat another bite if he tried.

Remus resisted the desire to force the boy to take a few more bites. Harry had barely eaten in days but Remus knew Molly well enough to know that she would see to it that Harry ate something while they were over there.

"Very well then," Remus replied. "Why don't you go wash up and find your shoes. We will head over to the Burrow soon."

"We really have to go?" Harry asked. If possible his expression had become even more miserable. His voice sounded as though he were on the verge of tears.

"We will visit just for an hour or so," Remus promised in a reassuring tone. He felt miserable at the idea of practically forcing Harry out of the house but he wasn't sure that allowing him to stay home and avoid the world was the best option either.

Harry's shoulders slumped a considerable amount.

"Once we are there you will be pleased that we went," Remus replied in a reassuring voice. "You haven't seen Ron or his siblings in ages."

Harry shrugged in reply as his right index finger traced the edge of his plate.

Remus sighed softly before replying. "We will stay for thirty minutes and then if you want to leave we will come straight home."

"Ron could come here," Harry suggested in a small voice.

Remus was silent as he mulled over the proposition. The look on Harry's face was enough to make him want to cry. The child's entire disposition was actually heartbreaking. It had only been four days after all. Perhaps forcing the child out of the house was a bit too much, despite what Albus Dumbledore thought.

"Alright," he finally agreed. "I will floo call Molly and see if she will send Ron over here and in return you will eat a few more bites of your meal. Deal?"

Harry was still for a moment before he nodded in reply. "Deal."

* * *

"Do you want to play Exploding Snap?"

Harry shook his head as he slowly brought his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around his legs.

Less than a week ago he would have been ecstatic at the idea of seeing Ron. For weeks he had planned out everything that he and his best mate would do together. Elaborate plans that included playing with his miniature Quidditch pitch, flying around the backyard, and playing Exploding Snap and chess until their hearts content. They would have joked around and laughed for hours. Now Harry didn't feel like doing anything.

Remus had left the two of them alone in the guest room that Harry had been staying in nearly thirty minutes prior. Since then Ron had done all the talking, careful to avoid the large elephant in the room.

"We could make a comic," Ron suggested.

Nearly a year earlier James had introduced the two of them to muggle comic books. Since then Harry and Ron had been obsessed with making their own comics.

Harry swallowed hard before he shook his head once more. He was determined that he wouldn't cry in front of Ron. Not that he hadn't before. There was the time that he fell off his broom and the time that he tripped over the curb and slammed his knee into the cement. Still, those were times that tears were appropriate. He had seen Ron cry the time that he fell out of the tree. Harry couldn't help but feel stupid and embarrassed about his emotions now.

"That was a dumb idea," Ron said a moment later suddenly remembering the connection. "Let's do something else, anything else. What do you want to do?"

"Nothing," Harry answered honestly. His voice was hoarse from all of the tears that he had cried over the course of the last few days.

Ron was silent as he digested these words. His mum had made him promise that he wouldn't bring up anything that had happened. She had also instructed him to cheer Harry up but he was starting to think that maybe his best mate just needed someone to be sad with. "We can do nothing," Ron agreed abandoning his spot on the floor. He carefully sat down on the bed next to Harry, tucking his knees up under him. Without giving his actions a second thought, Ron reached his right hand out and gently placed it on Harry's left arm.

The tears welled up in Harry's eyes as he blinked rapidly in an attempt to make them go away.

"It's okay," Ron said matter of factly. "To be sad I mean. I would be a mess if it was me."

Harry nodded as a single tear escaped his eye and a moment later dripped off of the tip of his nose.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Ron questioned as gently as an eight year old could.

Harry shook his head as he quickly brushed away his stray tears with the back of his right hand. It wasn't that he didn't appreciate what his friend was trying to do. He had honestly never seen Ron act so sympathetic. Still, he wasn't ready to talk about what had happened. He couldn't.

"You really have to go live with your aunt and uncle?" Ron couldn't help but ask. His parents had broken the news to him the previous day but Ron was still hoping that they had been somehow misinformed. He couldn't imagine a world without Harry being easily accessible and he was sure that with his muggle family members he wouldn't be.

Harry shrugged. "I guess. If they can't find Sirius."

A confused look swept over Ron's face. He was sure that he shouldn't repeat what he had heard. After all, he had only heard it because he had been eavesdropping on his parents. A habit that he was supposed to be working on breaking. He was sure that if he was found out he would be in a world of trouble.

"What?" Harry questioned. He knew the look on his best mate's face. He could read Ron like a book and this was no exception. The red head knew something and Harry had a feeling that it was important.

Ron shook his head, "Nothing." The word was barely out of his mouth when he sighed and immediately gave in. "The adults know where Sirius is. He is in Azkaban."

Harry felt the blood drain from his face as he quickly shook his head. "No, you're wrong. He went missing the other night. Remus said that he thinks that Sirius was so upset by what happened that he just ran off - disappeared."

"No," Ron shook his head. "That's not right."

"Yes it is," Harry insisted. "Why would Remus lie to me?" He could feel himself getting angry with Ron and he wasn't quite sure why. He refused to believe that his godfather was locked up in prison. He couldn't even fathom why such a thing would happen.

"Why would I lie to you?" Ron asked in a hurt voice.

"Why would you know that but I wouldn't?" Harry questioned angrily. "That doesn't make any sense."

"I was listening to my parents talking. I heard them say that Sirius was in Azkaban awaiting his trial but I don't know why he is."

"That's stupid," Harry declared after a moment of silence. He could feel his face getting hot. His palms were clammy and his heart was beating a mile a minute. "And you are stupid for saying it. Sirius isn't in Azkaban!"

"Then where is he?" Ron asked starting to feel his own temper rising. "Why would he just run off? Why wouldn't he be here with you?"

"I don't know," Harry replied in a frustrated angry. "Why would he be in Azkaban then?"

"I don't know! Why don't you ask Remus?"

As if on cue there was a soft knock on the door. A moment later, Remus' face appeared between the small crack that was made when he pushed the door open.

"Everything okay then boys? I thought I heard angry voices."

"Ron was just saying that he wanted to go home," Harry answered without a moment of hesitation. "Right Ron?"

Ron gave Harry a look that was equal parts angry and hurt before sliding off the bed. "Yeah, I want to go home."

"Home?" Remus questioned in a worried voice. "You only just arrived. Is everything alright?"

"Everything is fine," Harry replied hoping that Remus wouldn't ask any more questions and would just send Ron home before his friend could say anything either.

"I forgot that I told Fred I would help him do something today," Ron said. "So I really want to get home to do that."

Remus eyed the pair before slowly nodding in agreement. "Very well. Head downstairs Ron, I'll be down in a moment to escort you home."

Remus waited until Ron walked past him and down the hallway before he turned back to Harry. "I have a sneaking suspicion that Ron has no plans of helping his brother today."

Harry shrugged in reply. Again he felt like rubbish for not giving Remus a proper answer.

"The two of you had an argument," Remus stated matter of factly.

"Sort of," Harry admitted softly.

Remus clucked his tongue before clearing his throat. "Let me get Ron home and then we'll have some tea, yes?"

Harry nodded reluctantly. He really just wanted to be alone in his room but he was sure that Remus wouldn't allow it.

* * *

"Would you like to discuss it?" Remus asked as he placed a plate of chocolate biscuits on the table. He slid into his seat across from Harry.

Harry shrugged silently. Once again he could almost hear his mum light chiding to be more respectful. "Have you heard anything from Sirius?" Harry asked in a small voice.

Harry watched carefully as Remus cleared his throat and then looked away from him before shaking his head.

Harry wasn't sure that he could tattle on Ron's eavesdropping. It didn't matter how angry he was at his friend, they didn't tattle on each other. It was an unwritten rule of their friendship that neither of them ever broke. Still, Ron had told him to ask Remus and Harry wasn't entirely sure that he couldn't trust Remus not to tell Mr. or Mrs. Weasley about it.

"Can you keep a secret?" Harry asked as Remus gently pushed the tray of biscuits in his direction.

"I can," Remus nodded. He wasn't sure that agreeing to do such a thing wasn't the wrong choice to make however, he was sure that he needed Harry to open up to him. As far as Remus was concerned gaining Harry's trust was the most important thing he could do and as long as no one was in danger he could not see the harm in it.

"Ron told me something but he found out about it because he was eavesdropping and I don't want to get him in trouble."

"Okay," Remus answered slowly. "Does this have something to do with the argument that you two had?"

Harry nodded.

"Are you going to tell me what he heard?" Remus asked after a moment of silence. He had a horrible feeling that he knew exactly what Ron had heard but he was hopeful that he was mistaken.

"Do you promise to keep it a secret? What Ron did?"

Remus nodded silently before sipping his tea. After swallowing he held his breath as he waited for Harry to speak.

"Ron said that he heard his parents say that Sirius isn't missing, he is in Azkaban."

Remus shut his eyes tightly as he attempted to gather his thoughts.

"I told Ron that he was stupid. It doesn't even make sense. Why would Sirius be in Azkaban?"

Remus cleared his throat gently. He was sure that Harry would hate him in just a moment's time. He should have told the child the truth from day one. "What Ron heard was the truth," Remus said gently. "I'm so sorry for keeping it from you Harry. I mistakenly thought that with everyone else that you lost, the news about Sirius would only hurt that much more."

Harry felt tears well up in his eyes instantly. "Why would he be in Azkaban? He didn't do anything!"

Remus sighed softly before answering. "I'm not sure if you know what a Secret Keeper is Harry. It is a very old type of magic. It involves a complex spell but the end result is that someone keeps a secret for someone else."

"I know," Harry replied softly.

"Sirius was your parents Secret Keeper. He was the one who told Voldemort where you and your parents were."

Harry's tears stopped as he sucked in his breath. His mind raced to over a week earlier when he had heard his dad and Sirius discussing the fact that they had changed their Secret Keeper to Peter.

Harry had been told that Peter had been killed the same night as his parents and grandparents. He had been murdered on the street in Diagon Alley.

"Talk to me Harry," Remus said gently. "Please. Talk to me about it."

Harry remembered the conversation that he had had with his godfather perfectly. He had promised the man that he wouldn't tell anyone.

"You should have told me," Harry finally said.

"I'm sorry," Remus apologized once more. "You are absolutely correct, I should have told you the truth from the beginning. Please forgive me."

Harry nodded softly. "It's okay."

Remus gave a small grin.

"Can I send Ron an owl and tell him that I'm sorry?"

Remus nodded. "Absolutely. Are you sure that you don't want to talk more about Sirius? You must be feeling something in regards to this news?"

Harry shook his head softly. "I don't want to talk right now."

 **TBC...**


	9. Chapter 9

" _Is keeping a secret important?"_

" _Well as long as no one is hurt or in danger than yes," Lily answered honestly. "If someone trusts you enough to share a secret with you than you should respect that trust and keep their secret."_

" _And if someone is in danger than you should tell their secret?" Harry asked in a curious tone._

" _Or hurt," Lily added. "Honestly Love like I said, trusting someone with a secret is a rather important task. I believe that each case should be treated as its own. If you are planning on telling someone's secret then you must have a good reason." Lily paused for a moment as she eyed her seven year old. The child was hunched over a piece of parchment with the pack of muggle crayons that James had given him the day before. "Do you have a secret Harry?"_

 _Harry looked up at her flashing a toothy grin as he shook his head. "Nope. I was just wondering what you thought. Fred and George were talking about secrets."_

Harry rolled onto his stomach, his arms wrapping around his pillow. He was supposed to be asleep. It had been nearly three hours since Remus had tucked him in. It wasn't that Harry wasn't tired either. He was actually exhausted. However, he couldn't stop thinking about his godfather.

He didn't know a lot about Azkaban but what he did know wasn't nice. The thought of Sirius sitting in a cold jail cell was enough to make Harry want to go wake up Remus and tell him everything that he knew.

Despite that, he couldn't shake the feeling that Sirius had asked him to keep what he knew a secret. His godfather had trusted him. Harry wasn't sure that he was supposed to break that trust.

He had never gone against anything that Sirius had said. If the man asked him to do something, Harry did it - no questions asked. He had never even been in the position to want to go against something that Sirius said. But then, the stakes had never quite been this high either.

Harry sighed softly to himself as he let go of his grip on the pillow and rolled onto his back.

He had been able to trust Remus not to say anything about Ron but he was sure that this was a bigger deal. Remus would have to say something about this and then Harry would be breaking Sirius' trust.

Harry wished that he could tell Ron about it. At least then he could get his best friends opinion. Still, telling Ron would be wrong too.

His mum had told him once that as long as no one was hurt or in danger that keeping a secret was important. Harry was pretty sure that Sirius wasn't really hurt. He probably wasn't in danger either. Or maybe he was. Harry wasn't sure what Azkaban entailed. It wasn't a subject that his parents had told him a lot about and he had never really asked. Now he wished that he had. Maybe if he knew more about it his decision would be easier to make.

Harry sighed softly as he rolled back onto his stomach.

A moment later his bedroom door opened causing a large triangle of light to shine across the bedroom floor.

"You should have been asleep hours ago."

Remus' voice wasn't stern, it was full of concern.

"Can't sleep," Harry answered honestly.

Remus quickly crossed the room. A moment later he was sitting on the edge of Harry's bed. "Do you need something to help you sleep? Are you scared? Would you like to talk?" The moment that the words left his mouth he felt like a complete arse. Of course the child was afraid. He had been through an extremely traumatizing experience. Hell, Remus was scared and he hadn't even witnessed anything firsthand like Harry had.

Regardless of how much he loved Remus, Harry was filled with an overwhelming urge to tell the man to leave him alone. He could practically see his parents disapproving faces at the very idea.

Harry shrugged. "I'm okay."

Remus swallowed hard. He tried to somehow alter his own brain into one that would think as James and Lily did. He was absolutely sure that they would know exactly what to do in such a situation. "I think perhaps a small helping of Dreamless Sleep would do wonders for you," Remus said gently.

"Can I go see Sirius?"

The question caught Remus completely off guard. For a moment he nearly asked Harry to repeat himself but he was sure that he had heard the child correctly. Clearly he wasn't the only one that was having doubts about what Sirius was capable of. Despite that, there were some things that he just couldn't do.

"Sirius is in Azkaban," Remus replied in a dumbfounded voice.

"I know," Harry replied softly. "But I want to see him."

"Unfortunately I don't think that is possible," Remus retorted gently. "Azkaban isn't the sort of place that just allows visitors and certainly not visitors that are children."

Harry was silent.

Despite the darkness of the room, Remus could see the tears clinging to the corners of the child's eyes.

"You don't believe that he did it do you?" Remus asked before he could stop himself.

Harry's silence did not falter. He did not trust himself to speak.

Remus' brow furrowed slightly. There was something about Harry's expression. Something that he was beginning to be able to read like a book. "Do you know something Harry? Something that you wish to tell me?"

"No," Harry quickly answered.

Now it was Remus' turn to be silent. He was nearly certain that he was correct. He may not have shared the same relationship with Harry that Sirius had but he still knew the child well enough to know when he was lying.

Remus was sure that if he really wanted to he could force the truth out of Harry with little effort. He was also sure that that wasn't the route that he wanted to take.

"Alright then," Remus finally answered. "Let me just go get that Dreamless Sleep I suggested and I'll be right back."

Harry sighed once more as he watched Remus go. One thing he was sure of, he needed a plan.

* * *

"He asked to visit Sirius in Azkaban."

Albus could not help the frown that formed on his face at these words.

"Of course I informed him that doing so would be impossible," Remus continued. "However I find it quite interesting." Remus paused as he waited for a reply and when no reply followed he continued. "One would think that given the circumstances that Sirius would be the last person that Harry would want to see."

"Sirius Black is the child's godfather regardless of what was occurred. It may only be natural for Harry to take some time to process the information and understand fully how the man betrayed him as well as his parents."

"I can't help but think that Harry may share my feelings that Sirius is not guilty of the crime," Remus replied calmly. He wanted so badly to give Albus a piece of his mind as far as Sirius' crimes were concerned but he was sure that losing his temper wouldn't help the situation at all.

"He was their Secret Keeper Remus," Albus retorted evenly.

"He could have been under the Imperius Curse."

Albus closed his eyes for a moment before answering slowly. "Even if he were it would not change the outcome of what has happened. You are aware of the law. Whether he was under someone else's control or not it will not change his sentence in Azkaban."

Remus swallowed his anger at these words. He did not know how to explain his feelings on Sirius. He knew Sirius well - better than he knew himself at times. He knew Sirius' love for his friends - for his _family_ \- for the _Potter's_ was stronger than any curse. He knew that Sirius could not have possibly done what he was being accused of. He was certain that there was more to the story. He was also nearly certain that there was more to Harry wanting to visit his godfather than the boy merely wanting to say hello.

* * *

"Remus!"

The scream caused Remus to jump out of his bed. He was across the room and down the hall in seconds. He was sure he hadn't run as quickly as he was now since he was a child.

He literally skidded to a stop outside of Harry's room before pushing the door open and rushing into the room.

The sight of Harry nearly broke Remus' heart. The child's face was bright red, tears streaming down his cheeks as he sat up in his bed.

"Puppy," Remus said in a sad voice. The slip of the old nickname came out without his consent. It was a nickname that Sirius had given him as a baby. James, Peter, and Remus himself had found it so suiting that they had gotten into the habit of calling Harry by the nickname or some variation of it as well.

At the sound of his nickname Harry let out a particularly loud sob. It wasn't a nickname that he heard as often as he heard others. The last person that had called him by it had been his dad.

"What is it?" Remus asked as he quickly crossed the room. A moment later he was sitting on Harry's bed, his face now inches from the child's.

"I heard my mum," Harry answered through his tears. "Screaming for help. I couldn't get to her. I couldn't help her." His tears fell harder.

Remus leaned forward wrapping his arms around the child and pulling him into his lap. Harry instantly buried his face in Remus' chest, his shoulders shaking heavily with sobs. Remus made a mental note to discuss the Dreamless Sleep dosages with Molly. Clearly Harry needed the dosage for the next age group up.

"Alright breath," Remus instructed gently. "In and out, slow and steady."

Something in Remus' voice calmed Harry and he found his tears slowing down, his breathing slowly regaining normally.

"I couldn't help her," Harry repeated. "I couldn't help them. I should have."

"No," Remus replied softly. "No listen to me Harry. You were not responsible. What happened was not your fault in any way. No one expects that you would have been able to help - to save anyone."

Harry shrugged quietly causing Remus to suck his breath in as he searched for the right words to comfort the eight year old.

"Harry what happened was out of your control," Remus said gently. "It was out of anyone's control. I am sure that given the circumstances you did the best that you could to try and help your parents."

"I was scared," Harry admitted in a quiet voice.

"Well of course you were," Remus replied. "I would be worried if you weren't. You stood up to the most powerful dark wizard that has ever lived. Had it been me I would have been utterly terrified."

"Really?"

"Absolutely," Remus assured him. "And anyone who tells you that they wouldn't be is not being truthful."

* * *

"Do you think maybe I could go visit Ron?"

Remus was silent as he sipped his morning tea and mulled over the request. It had taken nearly two hours to get Harry back to sleep hours earlier and in the end Remus had ended up transfiguring a cot for himself in the child's room and sleeping next to him.

"Don't you think that perhaps you should take it easy today? Maybe take a nap this afternoon?"

"I'm not tired," Harry replied before taking a bite of his beans and toast. "Not even a little."

"Yesterday when Ron left it seemed as though you wouldn't want to see him again so soon," Remus mused.

"It was my fault," Harry reminded the man. "I didn't believe him about Sirius and I was kind of mean about it. I know I sent an owl but I want to tell him sorry in person."

Remus could certainly understand the need to apologize to a friend however, he was having a hard time with how easily Harry was acting as if he accepted the news about his godfather. This morning was the most cheerful he had seen Harry. Remus couldn't help but shake the feeling that the child knew something that he did not.

"Are you sure that you don't wish to discuss Sirius?" Remus asked before he could stop himself. "You must be feeling something in regards to the current situation."

"What's there to say?"

"Well for starters how you are feeling about it."

"It doesn't matter," Harry replied after taking another bite of his breakfast.

"Of course it matters," Remus quickly replied, "Your feelings matter very much."

"But it won't change anything."

"No," Remus admitted after a moment of silence. "You are right about that but it may help to talk about it."

"I don't think that he did it," Harry said without hesitation.

Silence filled the room, the only sound coming from the second hand moving around the large clock above the sink.

"Neither do I," Remus finally replied. He wasn't sure that confiding in the child was the best idea but he certainly wasn't going to lie. As far as he was concerned he had already done too much of that.

"Sirius wouldn't do that to us," Harry said in sober tone. "I know that he wouldn't."

"I agree with you Harry."

"If I could just talk to him," Harry said. "I could find out what happened."

"I don't see how that would be possible Harry. Unfortunately they won't allow children to visit anyone in Azkaban."

"I could send him an owl!" Harry nearly yelped with excitement as the idea entered his mind.

"Owls cannot deliver to those in Azkaban," Remus replied gently. "However if they could that would have been a wonderful solution. Unfortunately Harry this is a situation that is best left to the adults to handle and in the meantime I will check with Molly and Arthur and make sure that you may visit today. If it is alright with them we can go over after lunch."

* * *

"So you're telling me that Sirius gave his job over to Peter so it was Peter that ratted your parents out?" Ron asked in a flabbergasted voice.

Harry nodded.

He and Ron were outside in his best mate's treehouse. Harry had refused to say anything until they were some place safe where no one else could hear them.

"Tell Remus," Ron instantly said.

Harry shook his head. "I can't. I promised Sirius that I wouldn't tell."

"You just told me," Ron attempted to rationalize the situation.

Harry rolled his eyes. "That's different and you know it."

Ron nodded once in agreement before he replied. "So what are we going to do."

"I don't know," Harry answered honestly. "Do you know how to get to Azkaban?"

Ron's eyes grew wide at the question. "We can't go there! Are you barmy?"

"I have to talk to Sirius," Harry replied.

"Just tell Remus," Ron said. "It's a lot easier than trying to get to Azkaban."

 **TBC...**


	10. Chapter 10

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Harry slowly crept down the back steps that led to Remus' kitchen.

It was late. When Harry had left his room it was close to midnight and at least twenty minutes had passed since then.

He had thought that Remus was asleep when he had left his room. The house had been quiet for over an hour. It wasn't until he passed Remus' bedroom door and saw the light shining out from under it and heard the man sniffle loudly that he realized he was still awake.

It had thrown a small peg in his plan. Harry had nearly turned around and went back to his room to wait a bit longer. He had paused outside of the door for all of ten seconds before he decided that he had to keep going.

It didn't matter to him that Ron had thought he was crazy. Maybe he was crazy. He didn't care. He couldn't care. This was bigger than him.

His right foot stepped down causing the weight of his body to make the step squeak loudly.

Harry froze, holding his breath as he waited for the sounds of Remus leaving his room. He was familiar with sneaking around. Despite the fact that his dad had constantly scolded him not do so, had threatened him when he wouldn't stop, and had even on occasion punished him, Harry had never been able to help himself when it came to sneaking around.

Several moments passed in complete silence before Harry crept down two more steps.

He wasn't scared of getting caught. He knew that he should be. He was sure that Remus would be mad and Harry had never really experienced the man cross at him before. He couldn't worry about that though. He had two days until he was going to be made to go live with his aunt and uncle. He couldn't waste anymore time. He knew that if he left Remus' without trying to save Sirius that he would never get the chance again. He couldn't live with that.

Harry stepped off of the last step and onto the shiny wooden kitchen floor. His sneaker clad feet tiptoed across the room before he slowly cracked open the small broom closet door.

Remus had four brooms. All of which were a bit older but worked just fine. He wasn't a man that had ever really loved to fly but he always wanted to make sure that there were enough brooms in his house for a two against two Quidditch match when Harry visited.

Without looking, Harry reached his hand into the closet and pulled out the first broom that his fingers touched.

He had wanted to take Remus' wand with him too. He knew how wrong that was. He knew that his parent's biggest rule had always been to never play with their wands. Unfortunately Remus had his wand in his room with him. Harry wasn't completely sure that that wasn't a blessing in disguise. He didn't really know how to work it. He only knew that he was scared and somehow having it would have made him feel braver.

Harry took a deep breath before slowly walking towards the back door.

He knew he was acting irrational. He knew that if his parents were alive they would be furious at him for doing something like this. He didn't have any choice though.

Sirius was in prison and he couldn't tell anyone what he knew until he talked to his godfather and the man said that he could. He couldn't betray Sirius' trust. Not after everything that had happened.

Harry slowly and carefully pulled the door open just not enough to fit his body and the broom through the small crack and into the night air.

He shivered and then quickly zipped up his sweatshirt with his free hand.

He wasn't allowed to fly alone.

It was almost humorous that that thought passed through his mind. On the long list of rules that he was breaking at the moment, flying alone seemed miniscule. It didn't matter though. His parents were gone. He knew that Remus cared about him but he also knew that it was up to him to save his godfather and if that meant sneaking around on Remus than so be it.

Harry mounted the broom. It was a bit windy out and he couldn't help but worry that it would make flying more difficult.

He was just about to kick up off the ground when the back door opened behind him once more.

"What is this?"

Harry's first realization was that he didn't sound mad, he sounded upset - concerned.

"Where are you going?" Remus questioned before Harry could respond to his first question. "Have I caught you trying to run away?"

Harry shook his head. He didn't trust himself to speak without crying. He hadn't been feeling emotional at all but suddenly he felt the overwhelming urge to weep.

Remus took in the boy's face and then softly cleared his throat. "It's got to do with Sirius doesn't it?"

Harry's eyes went downcast, his mouth remained shut. He was beginning to feel absolutely frustrated with his situation. Remus wasn't going to just let him go. All hope was lost now of talking to his godfather.

"Harry James," Remus said in a voice so stern that he hardly recognized it as his own. "I asked you a question."

He was sure that he had never been stern with Harry before. He had never had a reason to. He wasn't even sure that being stern right now was what Harry needed. The realization of the situation had come together for him though. It appeared that if he had walked outside even five seconds later Harry would have been long gone. The thought of it was enough to make Remus want to sick up. He knew that the child had been through a lot and that perhaps being scolded wasn't the best route to take but he honestly could not help it.

Harry's head snapped up, his eyes locking with Remus' at the chiding. Remus had never scolded him before in his life.

"I was going to try and go see Sirius," Harry answered honestly. The idea of making up something else didn't even occur to him. Hot, angry tears were beginning to make their way down his face. He was annoyed at himself for getting caught and for promising Sirius that he would keep his secret. He was angry that his godfather was in Azkaban at all. He wished his dad was still alive. He knew that if he was he would know what to do.

Remus closed his eyes tightly for a moment before letting out a low, soft sigh. "Inside please Harry." His tone was much gentler now. The idea of the boy putting himself in a dangerous situation worried him immensely. He had to figure out how to communicate with the child.

Harry didn't argue. He knew that doing so wouldn't do any good. He used the back of his left hand to brush the tears off of his face. A pointless task as they were still falling. His shoulders slumped as he turned and walked back into the kitchen.

Remus followed and once inside held out his hand causing Harry to hand over the broom without hesitation. Remus placed it back into the closet and shut the door before waving his hand causing the kitchen to illuminate.

"Okay let's sit and talk," Remus said struggling to keep his tone gentle. He had never in his life wanted so badly to give Harry a good old fashioned spanking. The only thing stopping him was the fragile state that the boy had been in. His family had only been gone for a week. The child was hurting. That much was more than obvious.

Harry didn't reply but sat down at the kitchen table, the tears still streaming down his face.

Remus waved his hand once more causing a box of tissues to appear before Harry.

"You were trying to go to Azkaban to see Sirius," Remus said as he sat in the chair next to Harry. "Am I understanding this correctly?"

Harry nodded as he pulled a tissue from the box.

Remus swallowed hard as he tried to gather his thoughts. He needed to say the right thing. James would have handled this with ease. Even Sirius would have likely known what to say.

"You're mad," Harry stated through his tears as he whipped his eyes with the tissue.

Remus shook his head. "No. I need to know what is going on Harry."

"I promised," Harry said in a whisper.

"You promised who?" Remus questioned in worried tone. "Sirius?"

Harry nodded silently.

"Harry if you know something...something that is important about your godfather than you need to tell me. Even if you promised. If it could save Sirius than it is worth breaking a promise."

Harry considered these words. He knew that what he knew was important. Important enough to free his godfather. Yet he still hated the idea of breaking a promise. "You aren't supposed to break a promise," Harry said softly.

"That is very true," Remus replied. He noticed that Harry's tears had stopped but the child looked as though he could start crying again at any moment. "Sirius trusted you and I understand that you want to make him proud by not breaking that trust. That being said, if you can help him Harry that is more important than anything else."

Harry considered these words. He knew that after his dad, Remus was probably Sirius' best friend. He had even learned to turn into a dog just to make Remus feel better. Sirius probably trusted Remus a lot.

"It wasn't Sirius," Harry said softly. He hoped that Remus believed him. He didn't know what he would do if the man didn't. "He wasn't their Secret Keeper. It was Peter."

Remus felt his breath catch in his throat. He swallowed hard. His heart was beating at a rapid rate. His palms were beginning to sweat. He cleared his throat before speaking, "You're sure about this Harry?"

Harry quickly nodded. "I was listening to their conversation. I wasn't supposed to but I did and I heard my dad and him saying that they were changing it to Peter. I got caught and I promised Sirius that I wouldn't tell anyone. I promised."

Remus watched as the child's eyes filled up with tears once more. "And now you think that Sirius will be upset with you for breaking your promise?"

Harry nodded sadly as he blinked at a rapid rate in an attempt to hold his tears back.

"I have known your godfather for a very long time Harry and I promise you that he will not be upset," Remus said gently. "You absolutely did the right thing in telling me. Do you realize that this information will free Sirius?"

"I know. I just didn't want to break my promise to him. I've never done that before."

"So you wanted to speak to Sirius to get his permission to tell his secret?" Remus worked out.

Harry nodded once more. "Yeah."

"Harry I can't tell you how happy Sirius is going to be that you told me about this. I promise you that."

"You really think so?" Harry asked after a moment of silence.

"I do," Remus replied with a grin. "Now it's late. I think you need to get yourself up to bed. I am going to make sure that this information gets to the correct people."

Harry nodded in reply as he stood up. He walked three steps in the direction of the back staircase before turning back to Remus. "I'm sorry," he said in a sincere voice. "For trying to sneak out."

"It's okay," Remus replied softly. "I'll be in to tuck you in in just a moment."

Remus watched Harry disappear up the back staircase. The moment that the boy was out of sight he jumped up and practically ran to the study. He quickly wrote out a letter to Dumbledore and sealed it in an envelope before dropping it into the fireplace.

Tears of joy streamed down his face as he anxiously awaited a reply.

"I knew it," he said softly to himself. "I knew it could never be true."

 **TBC...**


	11. Chapter 11

**Author's Note: I am so sorry that it took me so long to update this (and all of my stories). I am currently 8 months pregnant and a bit uncomfortable most of the time and writing has taken longer than normal. I will try and do better!**

* * *

Harry rolled onto his side. He knew that he should be sleeping. Remus had been in to tuck him in ages ago and he had had to practically beg the man not to make him take a potion to aid him.

He also knew that Remus had been cross when he had found him outside. Harry was actually shocked that he hadn't gotten in real trouble. He was sure that Remus wouldn't be happy to find him still awake trying his hardest to hear the conversation that was going on below him.

He knew Professor Dumbledore's voice. The Headmaster at Hogwarts was a friend of his parents. Harry quite liked the man. Whenever he saw him he always gave him a bit of muggle candy. Harry was convinced that the man worked part time in a muggle candy shop. He pictured the man in one of those striped uniforms stirring fudge or making candy floss while little kids watched in amazement. He would have to braid his long beard to keep it out of the way but Harry thought that was a small price to pay for living a really cool double life.

Professor Dumbledore had been downstairs with Remus for at least an hour now. Harry had been trying really hard to remember what he had learned about the numbers on the clock. He was sure it had been an hour. He was also sure that they were talking about Sirius.

Harry knew that Professor Dumbledore was important. He had once heard his dad say that the Headmaster could make the Ministry change things if he had to.

Whenever something serious had been going on with his parents Professor Dumbledore always ended up at their house. Harry would lie awake at night listening to his parents worried whispers and the next day the old wizard would be there handing Harry a handful of lemon drops before he, Sirius, and Harry's dad locked themselves away in the study while Harry's mum tried her hardest to keep him occupied and away from the door.

Harry was sure that his parents never realized how much he had known. He didn't like them to know all his secrets. It was more fun when he kept some of them to himself. Plus he didn't like to think of them ever worrying about him.

Harry assumed that Professor Dumbledore was there because of Sirius' secret.

His two top front teeth chewed down softly on his bottom lip. It was a new habit. As little as six weeks ago he hadn't had his two top front teeth. They had taken forever to come in after his baby teeth had fallen out. When they were finally halfway there, Harry had taken to chewing down on his lower lip simply because he couldn't before. Somehow it had quickly become a nervous habit.

Harry hoped that telling Remus the secret was the right thing to do. He wouldn't be able to live with himself if his godfather was angry with him for it. Sirius had never been angry at him in his whole life. It didn't matter what he did wrong, Sirius always found a way to make light of the situation. Harry was sure that if his godfather ever did get mad at him he wouldn't be able to handle it.

He hoped that Professor Dumbledore was there because he knew exactly what to do. Not that he wasn't enjoying his time with Remus and not that he didn't love the man dearly, but he hoped that when he woke up in the morning Sirius was there too.

He hoped that he wasn't going to have to go stay with his aunt and uncle. He knew it was wrong to think but he had never really liked them. He used to have to go with his parents a few times a year to visit them. They were really boring and Harry always felt like they were kind of rude. Their son was horrible too. Several times over the years Harry had watched his cousin Dudley throw full on temper tantrums over the littlest of inconveniences. Harry could always remember Dudley's behavior making him feel proud that he didn't act like him. He had also heard his dad make the comment to his mum several times that Dudley would benefit from a good old fashioned spanking.

He would have to beg his godfather to understand why he shared his secret and to forgive him. Harry wasn't looking forward to it but he knew that it would be worth it in the end.

Harry rolled onto his back as he fought the urge to get out of bed and go listen at the top of the stairs. He knew that his dad hated when he did that and even though he didn't think that he would punish him he guessed that Remus deserved the same respect.

Still, not being able to make out what their muffled voices were saying was torture.

A moment later Harry heard the floo roar to life. He held his breath for as long as he possibly could. It was a game that he often played with himself. Once Sirius had timed him and they had discovered that Harry could hold his breath for 45 seconds. Ever since then Harry had been trying to beat his own time. He had learned that playing this game tended to make the time pass quicker.

Harry was sure that if he just kept doing it eventually the sun would be coming up and then he could find out what was going on with Sirius.

He nearly jumped when he heard Remus climbing the stairs and then walking down the hallway, pausing in front of Harry's bedroom door.

His eyes squinted tightly shut as he pulled the blankets tightly up around his neck.

Harry felt his eyes squint tighter even as the bedroom door opened and a soft light filled the room.

"I know that you aren't asleep."

Harry instantly noted that the man didn't sound cross at all. He actually sounded a bit amused.

Slowly he opened his eyes before giving Remus a sheepish grin.

"I am sure that sleeping right now doesn't seem like a possibility what with the night that you have had," Remus said as he crossed the room. He smiled softly down at Harry. "I understand but unfortunately I am going to have to give you a dose of Dreamless Sleep."

Harry's face fell as Remus pulled the small vial from his sweater pocket. He wanted to argue but instead he found himself using his elbows to push himself up to a sitting position.

"Can you tell me what's going on first?" Harry asked in a desperate voice.

Silence reigned for several long moments as Harry watched Remus' face change. It was clear to him that the man wasn't sure that telling Harry anything was the best idea. Harry was beginning to feel guilty for even asking though not guilty enough to regret doing so.

"As I'm sure you know Professor Dumbledore was here," Remus finally replied. He was sure that it was far too late and Harry was far too tired to comprehend everything. He was sure that the child was going to be exhausted, cranky, and emotional the following day. He was also sure that it was nothing short of abuse to keep the information from him. He knew Harry's heart. He knew that the child was likely near sick with worry over the fate of his godfather. He knew that if James were still here, he would tell his son. "He is traveling to the Ministry as we speak to demand that they listen to the information that you shared with me. Hopefully if all goes well the Ministry will be speaking with Sirius by tomorrow and things will be set straight."

There was of course much more to it than that. Sirius would likely be given a hefty dose of Veritissum. If he didn't answer every question that the Ministry threw at him correctly it would be probable that he could kiss his chance at freedom goodbye.

"Sirius will be home tomorrow?" Harry questioned in a hopeful voice.

Remus made a soft sound as he searched for the right words. After a long pause, he finally settled on the truth. "I don't know. It could happen that quickly or it could take several days. I cannot say for sure Harry."

"I don't want to go to my aunt and uncle," Harry said. He could feel his voice quavering. His emotions were fighting to get the best of him. He had told Remus this multiple times in the past few days but this was the first time that he had said it since a plan B actually existed.

"I know that you don't. We are doing our best to prevent that from happening."

"We?" Harry asked.

"Professor Dumbledore and I," Remus clarified. "He is aware that you are not keen on the idea of going. He understands and is working to find a solution in the event that Sirius is not home yet."

Harry nodded once in understanding. He hoped that they two of them would think of something that would keep him from having to go.

"It is also important that you know that if for some reason you have to go with them I will not stop fighting for you. Fighting for Sirius."

Harry couldn't help the small smile that spread across his lips. He always knew that Remus was amazing. Every memory that he had of the man was a happy one. He knew that the man's kindness was normal but Harry couldn't help the warmth that spread through him at the idea that Remus was fighting for him. For him and Sirius.

"And now unfortunately I think it is time for the Dreamless Sleep."

Harry scowled softly at the words.

"I know," Remus replied as he popped the small cork off of the phial. "It really is dreadful stuff. I remember at Hogwarts once Madam Pomfrey gave some to your father and he spit it right back out, even got some on her robes. Sirius and I thought it was hysterical though I am quite certain that Poppy didn't feel the same."

"Poppy?" Harry inquired with a smile.

"Madam Pomfrey's first name," Remus explained. "Though you will do well to remember once you are at Hogwarts to never call her that to her face." Remus paused as he extended his right arm, offering the vial to Harry. "You will also do well to get yourself a good night's sleep, you may find it will come in handy tomorrow."

Harry sighed softly as he took the small bottle from Remus' hand. "If you agree that it's disgusting why do I have to take it?"

"Regrettably sometimes in life you have to do things that you don't want to do," Remus said gently. "And one of those things is taking medication when need be regardless of how nasty it may taste."

"You sound like my mum," Harry said in a defeated tone before bringing the vial to his lips and quickly swallowing its contents.

Remus couldn't help the small grin that formed on his mouth. He hadn't heard Harry mention his parents so casually and without tears as of yet.

"She always made me take it too," Harry added after making a disgusted face. He handed the now empty vial back to Remus.

"I want you to know Harry that if I was able to I would keep you with me," Remus said as he took the small glass bottle out of Harry's hand. He swallowed hard forcing his voice to remain normal. "I would keep you with me rather than force you to go with your aunt and uncle."

"I know," Harry replied as he laid his head down onto the pillow. He had known it all along. The moment that the plan to send him to his relatives had been presented to him he had known that if it weren't for Remus' condition he would try and keep him. Unfortunately he had also heard Professor Dumbledore say that it wouldn't have mattered either way. Remus wasn't a blood relative so Harry couldn't stay with him forever.

Thankfully years ago his dad and Sirius had become blood brothers. Harry could remember the story that his dad had told him perfectly. His dad and his godfather and gotten a huge telling off from his grandfather about doing it but they both agreed that it was worth it. Harry couldn't help but wonder if his grandad was still alive if he would think it was a bad idea now. He was inclined to believe that his grandad would be happy about what they had done in retrospect.

"Sirius will be okay," Remus stated as he pulled the quilt up around Harry's shoulders. "And if I did not tell you earlier, thank you for trusting me with your secret. I promise you that it will only be beneficial in helping Sirius."

Harry yawned loudly as a skeptical look overtook his face. He was sure that telling the secret would help his godfather but he wasn't sure that doing so wouldn't upset Sirius.

Remus leaned over a placed a gentle kiss on Harry's forehead. He stood up straight once more before reaching out his right hand and ruffling the boy's hair. "I hope that you know how much I love and care for you Harry."

"I do," Harry replied as he yawned once more. "I love you too. A lot."

Remus smiled as his hand tousled Harry's hair once more. "Sleep well Puppy."

 **TBC...**


	12. Chapter 12

**Enjoy! And I promise I will be updating this story again soon.**

* * *

 _ **October 31st**_

 _ **5:22 am**_ _-_

Sirius let out a small groan of pure exhaustion as he rolled onto his side before sitting up. His eyes moved over to the clock on his bedside table. He had only fallen asleep a little over an hour ago. It had been nearly three in the morning when he arrived home from the meeting he and James had gone on. They had a mission this evening. They were sure that they knew where a Death Eater camp was in the woods not far from Hogwarts. They were also sure that they could destroy it.

Sirius groaned once more as his arms stretched over his head. In the past few nights he had hardly slept at all. His mind was constantly moving; filled with worries over the war, his families lives, his godson.

Harry was too smart. He understood too much. It was becoming far too hard to hide their fears from him. Far too hard to protect him from the harsh realities of the world.

The child wasn't even aware that it was Halloween. Despite Harry having zero contact with anyone aside from his immediate family it still was not easy to do such a thing. The child had asked several times if it was close, only to be told that it was still ages away. The very idea of it made Sirius' heart hurt. His godson loved Halloween. He loved planning out his costume and proudly wearing it as he walked around the neighborhood with his parents. Although Sirius knew that it was for his godson's own protection it still pained him. The boy was only eight. He deserved a happy childhood - the happiest of childhoods. He should not have to deal with the way that this war was destroying things. The way that it was making even the simplest of tasks impossible.

Sirius swallowed hard as his arms stretched up over his head once more before he stood. He moved across his bedroom fishing a clean shirt and a pair of jeans out of a large pile of clothing that sat on an armchair in the far corner. The clothing was clean but as always it would sit there until it was empty before being washed once more. Sirius never put his clothing away. In his opinion there was no need, he lived alone. He was also very careful when his mum visited to keep her out of his bedroom and avoid being lectured for his actions. Despite being an adult, he knew her too well. She wouldn't be able to resist commenting on the state of his bedroom.

Sirius walked out of his bedroom and across the hall to the bathroom. He hoped that a shower would make him feel better - more alive. The lack of sleep was starting to get to him. His eyes felt heavy all the time. He constantly felt like he was living in some sort of weird dream world.

The hot water woke Sirius up however he couldn't shake the feeling of grogginess that had settled into his mind days ago. He stood under the water until his fingers were wrinkled and the water was beginning to turn warm instead of hot.

Sirius stepped out of the shower, wrapping a thick fluffy blue towel around his waist. They had been a gift from his mum several months ago. She had stopped by for tea and used the loo while she was there. The following day she had shown up with three large bags filled with new towels. Sirius had tried to give her money for them but she would not hear of it.

He dried himself off before throwing the towel into the dirty laundry bin. His right hand rose, running through his long hair before he dressed in the jeans and shirt. He moved to the large mirror, rubbing away some of the fog from his shower so that he could see his face. The bags under his eyes were more apparent than they had been the day before. He sighed softly promising himself that he would take a dose of Dreamless Sleep that night. He hated depending on a potion for something as simple as sleeping but he knew his limits. He also knew that if the bags weren't gone before Sunday night his mum would fuss over him until he gave in and told her he hadn't been sleeping. He didn't mind her pestering in the least but the last thing he wanted was her worrying about him.

He stepped out of the bathroom and made his way down the hall deciding that sausage and eggs sounded wonderful for breakfast.

 _ **9am**_ _-_

Sirius' eyes scanned over the articles in The Daily Prophet. He had started reading the paper daily at sixteen. James had poked fun at him for it for the first six weeks that he had. His brother was so sure that it was some sort of elaborate joke. Sirius didn't blame him for his assumptions. Up until then he had never really enjoyed reading. Countless times throughout his years at Hogwarts he had been assigned reading by his Professors but he had hardly ever done it. Sirius was fortunate enough to have been born quite bright. He could hear a Professor say something once and remember it. He was always one of the smartest in his year. The only subject that he had never minded reading for was Astronomy however, reading was hardly ever assigned for that class.

His dad had read the paper every morning though and often brought up current topics to his sons over breakfast when they were home from school. James often found it boring and would just nod and grunt responses but Sirius found it interesting. He wasn't sure if it was how easily his dad explained everything and made it captivating or the fact that his birth father never took the time to talk to him about anything. After three years' worth of summers and school holidays with his dad discussing current events and Sirius having no idea what the man was talking about until he explained it, Sirius had decided that it was time to start reading the paper himself. That summer he would wait patiently every day until his dad was done with it and then he would read every article before lunch. It made the following morning conversations much more exciting and interesting. When he had returned to Hogwarts that fall he had been ecstatic to find that his dad had arranged for the paper to be delivered to him there. He found himself reading the paper every morning over breakfast and finishing it in between classes.

Sirius swallowed hard as he read an article about an attack on a half blood. The woman hadn't even done anything wrong. Her only crime being her muggle father who had passed away years prior. Sirius felt his heart hurt for her despite having no idea who she even was.

Things were getting worse. As little as a few weeks ago the paper had still held articles about Gringotts and Quidditch teams. These days the only articles in the paper where of attacks, Death Eaters, and Voldemort. He let out a long breath that he hadn't realized he had even been holding in. He couldn't help but wonder what was becoming of the world he loved. He couldn't help but wonder what kind of world it was shaping up to be for Harry.

A blind person could see how much he loved his godson. He loved the boy more than he loved himself. Sirius could not think of a single thing that he would not do for Harry. He had never once found himself cross with the child or even annoyed by him. That was the best part about being a godfather in his opinion; he could have all the fun without any of the hard times. It wasn't up to him to enforce a bedtime or make the child eat his vegetables. He was thankfully excused from disciplining Harry in any way. He did not envy James and Lily in the least. Sirius was quite happy with his role in Harry's life.

Sirius turned a page of the paper as his eyes traveled towards the clock. His thoughts went back to Harry once more. He had promised the boy that he would pay him a visit before lunch and despite his lack of sleep and the stress he was feeling, Sirius did not break promises to his godson.

 _ **11:35 am**_ **-**

Sirius looked down at his godson's frown meeting it with a frown of his own. "I know that you had wanted to fly and that the rain is putting a damper on that but I am sure that we can find something else to do."

Harry shrugged. "Everything else is boring."

"Harry," James said in a warning tone from across the room. The child had been in a mood for the duration of the morning. Harry had been so excited to take his broom out with his godfather and when the dark clouds rolled in and the rain started to fall, Harry's mood had fallen and turned a tad dark as well.

"Chess? Exploding Snap? One of those muggle board games your mum bought you?" Sirius gave the child options. The last thing he wanted was to allow the boy's bad mood to continue likely getting him into trouble eventually. He reached across the couch giving his godson a light poke in his side.

Harry giggled softly despite his attempt to stop himself from doing so. "Maybe a board game," he decided a moment later.

"That sounds perfect," Sirius nodded with a grin. "Plan on joining us Jamie?"

James shook his head, his attention on the book in his hands. "You two enjoy yourselves though."

"Wanna play up in my room?" Harry asked as he stood up from the couch.

Sirius nodded as he stood and followed the child out of the parlor and up the staircase.

"Are you and daddy going out tonight?" Harry pushed open the door to his bedroom and stepped inside. He went over to his closet looking up at the dozen board games his mum had gotten for him over the years.

"We are," Sirius nodded as he moved to stand next to his godson. "Do you know which game you want to play?"

"That one." Harry pointed up to one of his favorites. "Guess Who?"

A small grin spread across Sirius' lips at the words as he reached up and pulled the game from the top shelf. He had played the game dozens of times with the child. He would have bet all his money in Gringotts that Harry would have chosen it.

Harry walked across his bedroom, sitting down on the floor, his legs crossed in front of him. He looked up at his godfather as he moved towards him. "Do you have to?"

"Do I have to what?" Sirius questioned as he sat down across from the boy putting the game box in front of him. He took the lid off of it, removing the two trays that would hold the two dozen little cards. "Red or blue?"

"Blue," Harry nodded as he took the tray from his godfather's hand. He picked up his cards containing the small faces and began slipping them into the slots on the tray. "Do you have to go out tonight?"

"I'm afraid so Bean. We have a pretty important job to do tonight." Sirius began placing his own cards into the slots.

"Wiping out the camp," Harry nodded seriously.

Sirius felt his eyebrows raise in shock at the words though he continued to slip his cards into the slots. "Did your dad or mum tell you that?"

Harry shook his head as he placed his last card in its rightful place. "I heard daddy say it to mum." He paused for a moment looking up to give his godfather a serious look. "Don't tell them. I wasn't even eavesdropping. I was just playing. I couldn't help that I heard them."

"Hey," Sirius said in a mock offended tone as he reached out and poked the boy's knee lightly. "I'm not a prat young Sir. I don't tell."

Harry grinned. "I know." He paused for a moment as he waited for his godfather to finish arranging his cards. "Do you really _have_ to go tonight though? Can't someone else do it?"

Sirius eyed his godson carefully as he completed the task with his cards and set the small tray down in front of him. "Are you worried or scared about us going?"

Harry shrugged silently as he picked up the other cards in the box and shuffled them carefully. "It scares mum."

"Are you worried about her?"

Harry thought the words over for a moment before nodding. "I hate when she is scared. She tries to act like she's not but I can tell."

"Can you?" Sirius watched as the boy continued to shuffle the cards.

Harry nodded once more. "She does things the muggle way more and she gets real quiet sometimes."

Sirius would have liked to mention to Lily that Harry was picking up on these signs but he wasn't about to explain how he came to find out. He wouldn't betray his godson's trust in such a way.

"I'm not scared," Harry clarified. "But I don't like when she is."

"Of course you aren't," Sirius shook his head as Harry placed the small stack of cards that he was holding face down to the right of them. "I wouldn't have liked seeing your Granny scared either."

"Why is she?" Harry looked up at his godfather.

"Scared?" Sirius paused for a moment as he picked a card from the top of the deck and placed it in the correct slot at the front of his tray. "War makes people nervous Bean. I think she would just like it to be over."

Harry shrugged at the words. "Me too. Wouldn't you?"

"I would," Sirius agreed. "But I also want things to change before it is. I want the right side to win, I want us to win."

Harry was silent at these words as he selected his own card from the top of the pile, careful to keep his godfather from seeing which character was on it as his small fingers pushed it into its slot.

"I am sure it will be over soon," Sirius continued.

Harry looked up at the man. "I just want everything to get back the way it was. I want mum to not be worried and daddy to be home at night and me to be able to play with Ron."

Sirius sighed sadly at the words. "I want all of that too."

 _ **3:22 pm**_ **-**

"Your mum is upstairs getting a nap in. I am sure that she will be disappointed when she realizes she missed visiting with you," Charles said as he walked across the kitchen and began to fix a pot of tea.

Sirius grinned slightly as he sat down at the kitchen table. "I probably should have let you two know I was coming but I just needed to speak with you about something. It could not wait."

"Nonsense." Charles looked over his shoulder giving the man a smile. "You are welcome to drop by anytime Sirius. Surely you know that."

Sirius nodded as he watched his dad pull two teacups from the cabinet. They were from the same set that he and James had gifted their mum for Christmas years ago. She had had an old set that she adored. Her own mum had passed them onto her. One summer evening he and James had been in the kitchen messing around with curses that they had hardly learned yet. James had thrown one at him and missed, hitting her cabinet full of teacups. The curse broke several of them. The moment it happened Sirius had felt absolutely horrible about it. He hadn't even thrown the curse and he felt like the world's biggest prat. She had assured them that it was okay, that she forgave them, that she had too many teacups anyway. Sirius and James saved up their pocket money every week until Christmas and bought her a gorgeous full set of new teacups. She had cried tears of joy on Christmas morning.

"This conversation you wish to have sounds pressing," Charles continued.

Sirius nodded. "James said that he told you about switching the Secret Keeper to Peter?"

Charles nodded as he poured the boiling water into the teacups. A moment later he picked them both up and walked over to the table. He set done down in front of Sirius before sliding into his own seat. "He did."

"Do you think it was wise to do so?" Sirius held his breath as he waited for the man to answer. It amazed him how even now, as an adult, he cared so much if the man approved of his actions. He hadn't cared what his birth father thought of them since he was roughly five.

"I wasn't quite sure at first but after giving it some thought I think that it was very wise." Charles reached an arm out, placing his hand on top of his sons. "It is common knowledge to most people how close you and James are. I am sure that you are the first person that would be questioned. Why? Are you having doubts about switching the job to Peter?"

"No," Sirius answered honestly and without hesitation. "I just wondered what your thoughts were on it. I wondered if you approved."

Charles grinned softly at the words. "You are a grown man Sirius, you hardly need my approval."

"I know," Sirius answered looking up at the man. "I still want it though."

 _ **9:25 pm**_ **-**

Sirius walked across his parlor. He stopped in front of his armchair, picking up his jacket that was thrown over the arm of it. He slipped his right arm into it, pulling the jacket on before he picked up his wand from the coffee table. He tucked it firmly into the wand folder attached to his belt.

He had less than ten minutes before he was set to meet James at Hogwarts. From there they would move into the Forbidden Forest and beyond it in search of the Death Eater camp that Peter was sure had been set up out there.

The pair had volunteered for the job but Sirius had been especially proud when Professor Dumbledore had agreed that they would be perfect for it due to how much time they had spent sneaking into the Forest during their years as students. He found himself hoping that the Headmaster had mentioned his thoughts to Professor McGonagall. He would have loved to see the look on her face when he thought about all the times she had given them detention or sent an owl home for catching them sneaking around after curfew.

Sirius chuckled softly at the very thought as he moved towards his fireplace. He took a handful of floo powder from the large jar on his mantel before stepping into the hearth. He stated his destination clearly, a moment later stepping out of his own fireplace and into Albus Dumbledore's office.

 _ **11:05 pm**_ **-**

The tears ran down his face as he continued to attempt to brush them away with the back of his wrists. It couldn't be true.

 _It couldn't be true_.

They were dead. His entire family, gone in seconds.

Sirius turned the corner of the busy London street. He ignored the people staring at him in curiosity as well as the people that looked at him in fear. He did not care what anyone thought. His only concern at the moment was finding Peter.

The entire night had been a set up. The secret had been told. The Potters had been found. Not only James, Lily, and Harry but his parents as well - they were all gone.

Sirius coughed out a harsh sob as he hurried down a back alley in order to cut through to another street. He knew that Peter was nearby. He knew that he had come here.

He turned onto the busy street, his eyes narrowing as he spotted the man across the street. Sirius was across the street in several large steps, his wand drawn. He saw the fear flash through Peter's eyes before the man grinned diabolically.

 **TBC...**


	13. Chapter 13

**Enjoy! And I will try and update this again soon :)**

* * *

The sweat was dripping down his back. The hairs on the nape of his neck were drenched and stuck to his skin. Someone kept holding a blanket on him and no matter how much he struggled against it, he couldn't get it off of him.

He tried to scream as he watched his dad struggling against Voldemort. The evil man was laughing as his dad winced in pain on the ground. However, despite how loudly he tried to scream - no sound would come out.

There was a flash of green light and Harry somehow finally escaped the blanket that was trying to hold him down. He fell with a loud thud and found himself in his kitchen. His mum was now on the ground however, she was not dead yet. She was twitching around on the floor so close to Harry that he was sure he could reach out and touch her.

"Mummy!" He screamed, shocked that his words could actually be heard now. "Mumma! Please!"

There was another flash of light, however it was not green nor did it fade away.

"Harry," the familiar voice said urgently. "Puppy come on, you are dreaming."

Harry's eyes opened as he felt himself being lifted off of the floor. He wrapped his arms around the man tightly, his face hiding in the large chest.

He was still dreaming, he had to be.

"You are okay, just take a deep breath," Sirius said softly as he sat on the bed with his godson still in his arms. His hand moved instinctively to gently rub the child's small back.

Harry shook his head though did not speak. Had this been real he would have been mortified at the idea of his godfather finding him on the floor, screaming for his mum, sobbing like some baby. He was still dreaming though. Sirius was in Azkaban, not at Remus' comforting him.

A loud sob escaped Harry's lips shaking his frame as his grip on the man tightened.

"I'm here," Sirius murmured softly as he leaned down and placed a kiss on the top of the boy's head. "I'm right here."

"Yo- you're a- a dr- dreaaaam," Harry whined softly through his tears. Despite the fact that he was sure that Sirius was not real, he couldn't help but tighten his hold on his godfather once more.

"I'm not." Sirius tightened his own hold on the child. "I promise you I'm not. I am right here Harry." His fingertips brushed the boys back before he leaned down and placed another kiss on the top of his head.

Harry shook his head into the man's shirt. "Nuh-uh you- your're in Azk- Azkabaaaan." Harry's frame shook once more as a second loud sob broke through his lips. "An- and it's not faaaair. I don- don't wannna wake uppp."

Sirius sighed softly. He was sure that the child was still half asleep. Gently, he moved his hands to hook them under his godson's armpits. He carefully pulled Harry away from his chest, giving him at least a small portion of his face to look at. "No, listen to me. I was in Azkaban and I was very afraid that I would be there for a long time but Remus and Albus, they talked to the Ministry about our secret and now I am here. I just got here a little over an hour ago. I was going to surprise you over breakfast."

Harry was shaking his head the entire time his godfather was speaking until he got to the part about telling the secret. He paused in his actions, studying his godfather's face carefully. It seemed like he was telling the truth. He felt real. It all felt real.

"I- I'm sorrrry," Harry sobbed as he fought against the man's hold, burying his face in Sirius' thick shirt once more. "I'm so, so- sorrry."

Sirius' brow furrowed at the words as he hugged the child to him a bit tighter. "What could you possible have to be sorry for?"

"I- I told yo- your secret." Harry tried desperately to get his tears under control and failed miserably.

Sirius felt his heart hurt as the words registered with him. "No...no Bean - Harry, I should have explained better. Secrets are important to keep but sometimes they are also important to tell." His hand moved to rub the small back once more. "Do not be sorry for telling my secret. It was the right thing to do. It got me out of Azkaban. If it weren't for you I would still be there."

Harry didn't respond verbally however, his sobs grew harder as his small fingers gripped tightly at his godfather's shirt.

"I've got you." Sirius adjusted the child slightly in his lap as he moved back further on the bed. "I'm not going anywhere Harry. I'm here now."

"I tho- thought you were go- gone toooo." Harry's breath hitched as he forced the words out. He moved his head slightly, rubbing his face against the soft material of Sirius' shirt.

"I'm right here," Sirius murmured softly. "I am not going anywhere."

"I- I won't ha- have to go to Aunt 'Tunia's?" Harry pulled his head away from Sirius' shirt, resting his cheek against his godfather's chest.

"Absolutely not. You will come live with me." The man leaned down, kissing the top of the child's head once more.

"Wi- with you?" Harry's tears were finally starting to slow down and he was beyond thankful for it.

Sirius nodded. "If you want to that is. You don't have to if you don't want to. Everyone wants you...Remus of course, the Weasleys, everyone." Sirius wasn't even sure why he was saying the words he was. The child did not have choices like that. It did not matter who wanted him. It was either him or his aunt and uncle. That was all he had left.

Harry took a deep breath, his body shaking slightly. "Can we stay at my house?"

"No," Sirius answered honestly. He hadn't seen the Potter's house. He had heard it was nearly beyond repair. Even if it was still perfect though he could not imagine living there - where they had been murdered. Sirius swallowed hard before he opened his mouth once more. "If you don't want to live with me I will understand. I don't know what kind of parent figure I would make. I don't always know the right thing to do like your dad did. I can be very selfish and pretty stupid sometimes. I don't know what he was thinking when they picked me." Sirius gave a soft chuckle before clearing his throat and growing somber once more. "Not that I don't want to have you with me Harry. There is nothing I want more."

"I wa- want that too," Harry yawned as he wrapped his arms around his godfather's middle, hugging him tightly.

Sirius glanced over at the small clock on the bedside table. "It's late. We should get you back in bed."

Harry shook his head against the man. "Don't leave. Please Siri don't," he pleaded softly suddenly not caring in the least how childish he sounded. He was too afraid he would have that same nightmare again. He was too afraid that when he woke his godfather would be gone again.

"Okay," Sirius instantly agreed. "Lie down, I'll stay in here with you."

As the child crawled off of his lap, the man leaned down and pulled the blanket from the floor. Sirius stood from the bed, lying the blanket over his godson before he walked around to the other side and lied down beside him.

Harry instantly moved closer to his godfather, lying his head on the man's chest before he wrapped his right arm around the man.

"Hey," Sirius said softly. "I'm not going anywhere. I promise you Harry. I'll be right here when you wake up."

Harry yawned heavily once more as he nodded against the man.

"I'm not going anywhere," Sirius repeated the words once more in a whisper. He felt as though he was trying to convince himself as much as he was trying to convince the child. He tucked a hand under the pillow, his other arm moving to wrap around the small body next to him.

* * *

"I must say Harry, this is more than I have seen you eat in days," Remus beamed as he watched the child take another three pieces of bacon and move them to his plate.

"I wasn't hungry until now," Harry shrugged as he chewed a mouthful of eggs. His eyes moved to his godfather as he closed his mouth. He hated that he had been such a crying mess of a baby the night before when Sirius had woken him up. He had laid in bed for ten minutes after he had woken up an hour ago swearing to himself that he would never let his godfather see him like that again. Harry felt his cheeks prickle with warmth at the mere thought of the previous evening.

"Swallow your food before you speak please," Remus reminded the child as Sirius stood with the now empty plate of bacon. He picked up the plate and moved over to the stove, filling it with bacon once more.

"You could have just waved your hand and made it come over here," Harry pointed out, his mouth now empty. He carefully picked up his cup with two hands, taking a long swallow of his pumpkin juice.

"I happen to like doing things the muggle way," Sirius replied with a grin. "You know that Bean."

Harry shrugged once more as he carefully set the cup back down.

"You plan on leaving after breakfast then?" Remus glanced at Sirius as the man moved several slices of bacon to his own plate.

Sirius nodded as he bite into a slice of bacon.

"Leave?" Harry asked in a worried voice, his chin quivering slightly. His godfather had promised him multiple times last night that he wasn't going anywhere! He forced himself to try and calm down. He could already feel his eyes betraying him and his promise to himself not to cry in front of the man.

Sirius nearly choked on his bacon as the child spoke. He coughed loudly as he shook his head.

"I meant the two of you would be leaving, to go to Sirius' house," Remus clarified as Sirius reached out for his glass taking a long drink.

Sirius coughed loudly once more as he nodded in agreement. "You are coming with me," he agreed in a hoarse voice. The man cleared his throat loudly. "I told you kid, you are stuck with me now."

Harry felt his body relax at his godfather's words, instantly feeling silly for having thought that Sirius was going back on his promise. "Okay," he breathed. His eyes moved over to Remus, giving the man a small, sheepish grin. Despite the fact that he knew he couldn't stay with Remus, he still felt bad. He didn't want the man to think that he had hated being with him.

Remus returned the grin, thankful that the child seemed happier than he had been in days. He certainly wasn't back to his normal self but it was a small step in the right direction. A step that Remus knew would be taken the moment Sirius was home. He had been dreading delivering the child to his relatives. The man could not imagine anything worse actually. He was beyond pleased that the situation would now never occur.

"I believe Albus is currently moving your things from your old bedroom to your new room at my house." Sirius ate another bite of the piece of crispy bacon in his hand.

"Albus?" Harry questioned in a small voice.

" _Professor Dumbledore_ ," Remus corrected Sirius' words. James and Lily had always been sure to refer to the Professors at Hogwarts as well as other adults in a proper manner. Lily in particular would have given the child quite the scolding if he ever referred to an adult outside of their small circle of family by their first name. Remus recalled a time less than two months prior when Harry had made the mistake of calling Molly by her first name in front of Lily. Remus had been sure he had never heard her become quite so stern with her son. Manners were more than important to her.

"Right," Sirius nodded in agreement. "Professor Dumbledore. He is moving your things as we speak Pup."

Harry gave a silent shrug at the words. He tried to picture the guest room at his godfather's house. He had only been in there once or twice that he could remember. It was a nice enough room but he couldn't picture his things in it.

A frown crossed Sirius' lips as he glanced over at Remus. He knew that Harry was heartbroken and rightfully so. He knew that the child had witnessed something that would likely haunt him for years to come. He knew that the boy was scared and sad. Sirius himself, was beyond sullen. He did not have an inkling of an idea of how to help his godson though.

Harry glanced up at the two adults, pushing his plate slightly away from him. "Can I go pack up my stuff that is here?" He did not have much with him, a few pairs of pajamas and some other clothing.

Remus nodded. "Of course you may."

Harry stood, pushing his chair in before he began making his way up the back staircase. He had too many thoughts rushing through his head to sit at the kitchen table and continue eating. He loved Sirius. Aside from his parents, the man was easily his favorite person in the world. Harry was beyond happy that his godfather was home and not locked away in some prison. He was thrilled that he would be going with him and not to his aunt and uncle's house. Still, he couldn't help but worry.

Sirius was wonderful and fun and cool. Still, Harry couldn't help but think about his mum and how she would teach him every day. Was Sirius going to do that? Did he even know what he was learning? Did he know how to teach it like his mum did so that it was still fun? Did Sirius know that spacing words when you wrote them was important? Did his godfather know that if he couldn't concentrate his mum let him take a quick break for a snack or let him take out his little broom for a ten minute fly to get his energy out?

Then there was all the other things. Was Sirius going to tuck him in every night like his parents always had? Was he going to explain dragons to him the way his dad always had? Was he going to know that Friday nights meant he could have ice cream for dessert and sometimes his dad even surprised him with a trip to the ice cream parlor in Diagon Alley? Was he going to read him muggle stories like his mum did and Beedle and Bard like his dad did? And what if he got in trouble? He was nearly certain that Sirius wouldn't actually punish him but Remus might if Sirius didn't.

Harry swallowed heavily as he stepped onto the second floor and walked down the hall to the room he had been staying in.

What if he got hurt? What if he got scared? What if anything happened to make him seem like a complete baby? After last night he never wanted to act that way in front of his godfather again.

He pushed open the bedroom door and moved over to the bed, pulling the small satchel he had out from under it.

* * *

"How am I supposed to do this?" Sirius asked in a hushed tone, tears rimming his eyes. "You should have seen him last night. He was an utter mess. I have never seen him so distraught in his entire life."

"He lost everyone Sirius," Remus replied softly as he leaned back on the couch, pinching the bridge of his nose. His eyes shut tightly for a moment before his hand dropped and they opened once more. "Aside from you and I and his friends he has lost everyone he has ever known."

"I don't know how to make that better," Sirius confided in his friend as his eyes filled with tears. The man ran the back of his right hand over his eyes roughly in an attempt to keep his emotions at bay. His heart was aching for his godson. It was aching for his own loss of the only real family he had ever known. He couldn't imagine a word without James in it. He couldn't imagine a word without his mum and dad. "It's not the same as what I went through. I left my family on my own accord. I never once regretted my decision and did not miss them in the least."

"No it is not the same." Remus nodded. "However, you and Harry are going through the same thing in this very moment. You both loss a set of parents you loved very much."

Sirius was silent for several long moments as he gave into the tears which were now running down his face and dripping from his chin. "How can I fix him when I am a mess myself?"

Remus sat up straighter, reaching a hand out and placing it on his friend's knee. "Perhaps you can heal one another."

"I'm ready," the small voice spoke from behind them causing Sirius to quickly begin brushing the tears from his face.

"So you are." Remus stood up and walked past his friend, concentrating on Harry in an attempt to buy Sirius a few more moments to compose himself. "You remembered your toothbrush from the bathroom?"

Harry nodded. "Yeah, and my snitch that was in the hallway."

"It sounds as though you _did_ remember everything." Remus reached out and took a gentle hold of the child's arm, pulling him close to him and wrapping his arms around him. "I've quite enjoyed having you here Harry. I think I may have to come visit you tomorrow before I miss you too much."

Harry gave a nod at the words. "Thanks for letting me stay Remus." It didn't matter that his mum wasn't there to give him a pointed look if he forgot to say it. It had been drilled into his head for eight years, you always thanked someone when leaving their house. A soft sigh escaped the child's lips at the mental reminder, his mum's voice ringing in his ears.

"You are welcome here any time." Remus squeezed the child tightly before letting go of his grip on him. "You remember that."

Harry nodded in reply as he looked around Remus to his godfather. Sirius' eyes looked red and Harry couldn't help but wonder if the man had been crying. He quickly pushed the very idea out of his mind. Sirius didn't cry.

Sirius cleared his throat, silently praying that his voice would not appear hoarse. "I guess we should get home and get your room all set up."

Harry nodded in reply though he couldn't help but think that he would never go home again.

 **TBC...**


End file.
